Here's to you, 2009

Pearl Jam's Eddie Vedder cries out at the end of "Yellow Ledbetter," "I don't know whether I'm a boxer or the bag." After watching a team with a payroll exceeding $135 million get blugeoned by the worst team in baseball, that's a rather appropriate question.

[Worth noting: "Yellow Ledbetter" stands as one of the most unintelligible songs ever written. That line could very well deal with a grocer asking a customer, "would you like these olives in a box or a bag?" So takes that line, paragraph, and the rest of this article with a grain of salt.]

This isn't a column on lyrical interpretation, though. This is a column proclaiming Eddie Vedder as the poet laureate of Cubdom. Vedder visited Len and Bob in the booth last night and penned a quick verse for the night's debacle. In fact, no one line captures the past one hundred years, as well as the future, as the closing argument ended his stay with:

"I might lose hope but I know I won't"

A week ago it would have been premature to announce that Cubs need to start making vacation plans in October. Today, different story. Shellackings at the hands of the Washington Nationals do that.

In other words, pack up the peanuts and find the mothballs for the foam fingers. The Wild Card and the division are out of reach for a team that gets swept by the Phillies, pummeled by the Padres, drops two winnable games in LA to a reeling Dodgers team, and gives up 15 runs to a team that misprints its name on its own jerseys.

Sorry Eddie. Hope for 2009 is lost, and hope for 2010 requires a second mortgage to take your family to a game. It's time to reevaluate.

So, with just over a month left in the season, let's stick a match in the Hot Stove and get the party started. This winter's topics include, but are not limited to:

Jim Hendry: Plain and simple. There are changes that need to be made, and if Hendry is willing to make them, he stays. He fleeced the Pirates in 2003 on his way to the NLCS and built a two-time Central Division champion. Yes, he made mistakes, but the positives outweigh the negatives. Hendry deserves 2010 to prove that this team isn't irreparable.

Lou Piniella: This one is a bit trickier. The man is a great manager - remember moving Sean Marshall to left field to outmaneuver Tony LaRussa? But he looks like he's lost the fire, and that's something that this club needs. Give Piniella some time to consider his options. If he stays, he needs to prove to Hendry and the new ownership that he's still invested. If not, then consider Alan Trammel. I would to see Sandberg at the major league level, but give him another year, preferably as a member of Trammel's staff.

Carlos Zambrano: Big Z's situation is about as troubling as someone covering The Ronettes classic tune "Be My Baby" (the credit there goes to Maroon 5). You have an ace in Zambrano. You have a guy that posted a 2.75 ERA in 31 starts in 2004, is still under 30 and plays with more fire than any two Cubs combined. The flip side is too disconcerting to ignore though. He's never won 20 games in a season, hasn't finished a season with an ERA under 3.91 since 2006, and continues to suffer from strange injuries and 90s boy band frosted tips. In other words, it's time to go. In a pitching-thin market, Zambrano should be a hit. At least see what you can get for him.

Alfonso Soriano: There are two options. Hire a baseball psychologist and give him one more season, or trade him. If that involves eating salary, fine. While Sam Fuld will never be the hitter that Soriano could be, I would much rather see him in left field. Hustle and passion can go a long way, especially in a tandem that involves Jake Fox's bat.

Rich Harden: It'll be costly, but he's been great down the stretch. Similar to Zambrano, he possesses the stuff to be an ace. It's his injury status that causes concern. Are we looking at another Mark Prior? Maybe. Still, he's under 30, has made 33 starts the past two season combined with the Cubs (so far), and has been the best starter down the stretch. Is he worth the $50-$60 million he'll command? Yes.

The Bullpen: I'll keep this brief. Aaron Heilman must go. Return Kevin Gregg to sender. Hire that same baseball psychologist for Carlos Marmol. Bring up Andrew Cashner. That's a start.