Anemia is defined as "any condition in which the number of red blood cells, the amount of hemoglobin in 100 mL of blood, and/or the volume of packed red blood cells in 100 mL of blood are less than normal."
Clearly, doctors are omitting one critical sympton.
While 13 hits and one run over a two-game span doesn't register on WEbMD as anything fatal, it certainly isn't considered healthy. The Cubs dropped two straight to the Reds, a 3-0 duel between Theodore Lilly and Johnny Cueto, as well as a 7-1 spanking that came complete with another Milton Bradley controversy.
Where to begin?
Superb pitching deserves to be rewarded. Theodore was masterful over seven innings, allowing only an unearned run that came on a throwing error that he made in the third. More importantly, he didn't walk a man [take notes bullpen. That goes for you too Kevin Gregg]. Lilly has never opened a season 3-0, which leads me to believe that the Cubs vied for upholding tradition over protecting the standings.
Then again, with the way Cueto was throwing, we didn't have much of a chance.
Cincinatti's young righty matched Lilly inning for inning, allowing only four hits without issuing a walk. While his arm is eligible for an AARP card as a result of the Dusty Baker school of pitching, in Dusty-We-Trusty is getting a lot of miles out of his 23-year old phenom.
David Weathers, our KEY midseason acquisition to help us with the stretch run in 2001, relieved Cueto after seven. Weathers and Francisco Cordero closed the door on the game. These games are going to happen; it's a long season. But two games in a row is a bit hard to swallow, especially when your vaunted offense is expected to help mask a floundering bullpen.
Thankfully for the Cubs, the series finale was dwarfed by the embarrassment that took place at the United Center on Thursday [talk about a rough day for the city of Chicago]. Carlos Zambrano took the mound, entering with 5-0 record and a 0.97 ERA in his last five starts against the Reds.
Well, 5-1 doesn't sound that bad. Does it?
Zambrano was solid through six, giving up only two runs. His downfall came in the seventh after the Cubs picked up a run to make it 2-1. Zambarno, aided by a Micah Hoffpauir error, gave up two more runs. That was all the Reds would need to put the game out of reach. Aaron Harang was nearly as good as Cueto, but he certainly gave the Cubs the opportunities they needed to win this game.
Call it poor execution. Call it a hangover from the "Night of the Curses." Call it what you will.
Milton Bradley will call it a witch hunt. Bradley began to sink just a little bit deeper into hot water, reporting to the Chicago media that they were out to villianize him, and Lou Piniella's benching of Bradley didn't help matters. Bradley was given a seat because he isn't healthy. However, when the new guy is called into the manager's office 14 games into the season, heads begin to shake. Hopefully this is nothing more than a bump in the road, and Bradley will be back on the field in the next week.
Anemia isn't a funny topic, and neither is an offensive core earning $66.4 million with limited production. The Reds are better than in years past, but they're not cracking anyone's Top 10 anytime soon. These are the series you have to take if you're going to win a division, especially with St. Louis appearing to be a quality opponent [and have you seen that new Albert Pujols-ESPN commerical? That's quality].
Friday, April 24, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Sympathy For The Devil
What is it with foul balls and cats?
In an obscenely-offesnive montage that tested the sanity of even the most centered Cubs fans, a fan leaned over the wall in left field and prevented Alfonso Soriano from grabbing a fourth-inning foul ball. The scene, and the location, were eerily similar to THAT moment in Game 6 of the 2003 NLCS.
If it didn't happen in a game attended by Dusty Baker, it just wouldn't have felt right.
Shortly after, a cat was seen prancing around the field, a sure-fire tribute to the black cat that streaked in front of the Cubs dugout in 1969. While 2009's four-legged version of terror wasn't black, didn't pull a Tom Cruise and fly by the dugout, and didn't occur in New York, it rekindled beliefs in omens all over again.
Wonderful. ESPN is going to love this one. Ron Santo is strangling his microphone.
Somehow, someway, the Cubs overcame any semblance of spiteful Godly intervention and surged ahead for a 7-2 win over the surprisingly mediocre Reds. Apparently Micah Hoffpauir doesn't believe in ghosts.
Hoffpauir, making the most of his recent string of at bats, tied the game early with his first home run of the season. He added a tie-breaking sac fly in the fifth inning. Filling in for Milton Bradley, Hoffpauir is hitting .375 in limited action when compared to the amount of at bats he had in Spring Training. However, the drop off hasn't hurt the 29-year old rookie, who's showing signs of being a big piece of this team's offense.
Rich Harden was also worthy of world wide web praise, efficiently cruising through six innings and holding the Reds to two runs. Harden picked up his first win of the season and ran his strike out total up to 26. Not bad for three outings.
The bullpen was flawless. The offense was clicking. Any relevant curses were brought back to the country's forefront and quickly downplayed by the "W" flag. My heart registered a few healthy beats for the first time since February.
Altogether, very un-Cub. I like that.
In an obscenely-offesnive montage that tested the sanity of even the most centered Cubs fans, a fan leaned over the wall in left field and prevented Alfonso Soriano from grabbing a fourth-inning foul ball. The scene, and the location, were eerily similar to THAT moment in Game 6 of the 2003 NLCS.
If it didn't happen in a game attended by Dusty Baker, it just wouldn't have felt right.
Shortly after, a cat was seen prancing around the field, a sure-fire tribute to the black cat that streaked in front of the Cubs dugout in 1969. While 2009's four-legged version of terror wasn't black, didn't pull a Tom Cruise and fly by the dugout, and didn't occur in New York, it rekindled beliefs in omens all over again.
Wonderful. ESPN is going to love this one. Ron Santo is strangling his microphone.
Somehow, someway, the Cubs overcame any semblance of spiteful Godly intervention and surged ahead for a 7-2 win over the surprisingly mediocre Reds. Apparently Micah Hoffpauir doesn't believe in ghosts.
Hoffpauir, making the most of his recent string of at bats, tied the game early with his first home run of the season. He added a tie-breaking sac fly in the fifth inning. Filling in for Milton Bradley, Hoffpauir is hitting .375 in limited action when compared to the amount of at bats he had in Spring Training. However, the drop off hasn't hurt the 29-year old rookie, who's showing signs of being a big piece of this team's offense.
Rich Harden was also worthy of world wide web praise, efficiently cruising through six innings and holding the Reds to two runs. Harden picked up his first win of the season and ran his strike out total up to 26. Not bad for three outings.
The bullpen was flawless. The offense was clicking. Any relevant curses were brought back to the country's forefront and quickly downplayed by the "W" flag. My heart registered a few healthy beats for the first time since February.
Altogether, very un-Cub. I like that.
Why Does It Always Rain On Me?
If the rain must fall, then why can't it happen on someone else's time?
On Sunday, I was slated to make my Wrigley Field debut as the Cubs looked to take the series 3-1 from the Cardinals on ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball. The tickets were a birthday present.
First career Sunday Night game. First career rainout. Hardly joyfull and triumphant.
The unfortunate brake in the baseball action gives us a chance to catch up on some other topics, most notably the Bulls surprising/shocking/altogether scintillating Game 1 victory over Boston at the Garden. Behind Derrick Rose's 36 points and 11 assists, the Bulls held on for the crucial 105-103 overtime win. This was the first time in 11 tries that the Bulls have beaten the Celtics in the Playoffs, something that even Michael couldn't do.
[Somewhat related note: Larry Bird famously noted after Jordan dropped 63 on Boston in Game 2 of the 1986 Playoffs, “I think he’s God disguised as Michael Jordan.” Needless to say, Derrick Rose and the kids just etched a place in the Bulls Pantheon right next to the man that can only be described as the closest thing to God that God would allow. Good for them.]
Rose was otherworldly, shunning any doubts that his rookie status would prevent him from shining on the NBA's brightest stage. He outdueled his point guard counterpart, Rajon Rondo, and single-handedly stiffled a Celtic rally in the third quarter by hitting five straight shots, several of which belong on his season highlight reel.
Not on Rose's level, but still impressive nevertheless, was Joakim Noah. The former college star returned to the postseason for the first time since his championship season at Florida and didn't disappoint, working awfully well with Rose and stiffling the Boston attack on the glass. Yes, Noah's affectiveness was due in large part to the absence of Kevin Garnett, but Boston went 18-7 this year without the Big Ticket. It's safe to say Noah didn't grab 17 rebounds against a YMCA grade school team.
Don't pencil in the Bulls for the second round just yet, but heading back to Chicaog up 2-0 or even 1-1 gives them a fighting chance for advancing. Game 1 showed that the Bulls DO want it and the Celtics aren't infallible. Also, don't be surprised if KG shows up should the Bulls take a two-game lead, either 2-0 or 3-1. Can anyone say Willis Reed?
Additionally, the Blackhawks opened up a 2-0 series lead against the Calgary Flames. Combined with the growing fuss over Jay Cutler's nightlife, Chicago has become THE sports hub of known world.
Let's just hope the Cubs can beat the rain and keep up.
On Sunday, I was slated to make my Wrigley Field debut as the Cubs looked to take the series 3-1 from the Cardinals on ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball. The tickets were a birthday present.
First career Sunday Night game. First career rainout. Hardly joyfull and triumphant.
The unfortunate brake in the baseball action gives us a chance to catch up on some other topics, most notably the Bulls surprising/shocking/altogether scintillating Game 1 victory over Boston at the Garden. Behind Derrick Rose's 36 points and 11 assists, the Bulls held on for the crucial 105-103 overtime win. This was the first time in 11 tries that the Bulls have beaten the Celtics in the Playoffs, something that even Michael couldn't do.
[Somewhat related note: Larry Bird famously noted after Jordan dropped 63 on Boston in Game 2 of the 1986 Playoffs, “I think he’s God disguised as Michael Jordan.” Needless to say, Derrick Rose and the kids just etched a place in the Bulls Pantheon right next to the man that can only be described as the closest thing to God that God would allow. Good for them.]
Rose was otherworldly, shunning any doubts that his rookie status would prevent him from shining on the NBA's brightest stage. He outdueled his point guard counterpart, Rajon Rondo, and single-handedly stiffled a Celtic rally in the third quarter by hitting five straight shots, several of which belong on his season highlight reel.
Not on Rose's level, but still impressive nevertheless, was Joakim Noah. The former college star returned to the postseason for the first time since his championship season at Florida and didn't disappoint, working awfully well with Rose and stiffling the Boston attack on the glass. Yes, Noah's affectiveness was due in large part to the absence of Kevin Garnett, but Boston went 18-7 this year without the Big Ticket. It's safe to say Noah didn't grab 17 rebounds against a YMCA grade school team.
Don't pencil in the Bulls for the second round just yet, but heading back to Chicaog up 2-0 or even 1-1 gives them a fighting chance for advancing. Game 1 showed that the Bulls DO want it and the Celtics aren't infallible. Also, don't be surprised if KG shows up should the Bulls take a two-game lead, either 2-0 or 3-1. Can anyone say Willis Reed?
Additionally, the Blackhawks opened up a 2-0 series lead against the Calgary Flames. Combined with the growing fuss over Jay Cutler's nightlife, Chicago has become THE sports hub of known world.
Let's just hope the Cubs can beat the rain and keep up.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Fishfood: Marlins, Pitching Induce Nausea
Yesterday's loss was tough. Seeing my girlfriend in a Marlin's jersey was worse.
[Side note: let's talk about the Marlins. This obsessive hatred goes so far beyond 2003, which I'm sure most of you can attest. First and foremost, they've picked up two World Series in seven years. After each title, they dismantle the team, rebuild, and are ready for another title bout. And this most recent rebuilding phase? Well, they've started 2009 10-1.
You do the math.
They had Dontrelle Willis when he was still Dontrelle Willis, a former Cubs prospect. They fleeced us for Juan Pierre, who left/was run out of town after only one year. They gave us Kevin Gregg for one of the most promising prospects in our minor league system. They did give us Derrek Lee, but we haven't won a postseason game since. And yes, they capitalized on one of the worst collpases in sports history. That, ladies and gentlemen, is why my girlfriend in a Marlin's jersey made me nauseus.]
Fortunately for me and the future of my relationship, Alfonso Soriano intervened. Soriano provided some more late-inning heroics, hitting a two-run shot in the eighth inning to put the Cardinals away for a come-from-behind 8-7 victory.
Our very own lighning rod continues to shine late in games, and memories of his three previous strike outs were quickly erased. For people who have spent the past 100 years pining, we seem to have short memories when it comes to our left fielder.
But before we annoint Soriano and the Cubs as saviors of sanity on the North Side, let's explore the journey they took to get to the eighth. Carlos Zambrano struggled mightily, giving up all seven runs and blowing an early 3-0 lead. However, since the bullpen was so depleted, Zambrano had to suffer through seven innings and 109 pitches. The home run proved to be his undoing, as he gave up two to Ryan Ludwick and another to Brian Barden.
And for our next activity, please pick out Brian Barden from this lineup. Can't? Yeah, that's what we thought.
But enough about Zambrano. Our offense saved us, refusing to acquiesce. Derrek Lee continued to impress, as did Micah Hoffpauir, and Kosuke Fukudome continued to set the table at the top of the order. Aramis Ramirez and Geovany Soto also got in on the action, coming up with the kind of situational hitting that the Cubs rarely seem to possess.
Simply put, the offense showed more character than James Cromwell, and Soriano put the Cardinals away on a no-doubter.
Carlos Marmol and Aaron Heilman also deserve their Kudos bars, as Heilman bridged the gap to the ninth, and Marmol continued to make us second guess this Kevin Gregg experiment. After walking the lead off batter and plunking Albert Pujols, Marmol resumed filthiness and evened the series at 1-1. Nausea, and potential ealry-onset insanity, avoided.
Too bad the morning's fish food beat the Cardinals to the punch.
[Side note: let's talk about the Marlins. This obsessive hatred goes so far beyond 2003, which I'm sure most of you can attest. First and foremost, they've picked up two World Series in seven years. After each title, they dismantle the team, rebuild, and are ready for another title bout. And this most recent rebuilding phase? Well, they've started 2009 10-1.
You do the math.
They had Dontrelle Willis when he was still Dontrelle Willis, a former Cubs prospect. They fleeced us for Juan Pierre, who left/was run out of town after only one year. They gave us Kevin Gregg for one of the most promising prospects in our minor league system. They did give us Derrek Lee, but we haven't won a postseason game since. And yes, they capitalized on one of the worst collpases in sports history. That, ladies and gentlemen, is why my girlfriend in a Marlin's jersey made me nauseus.]
Fortunately for me and the future of my relationship, Alfonso Soriano intervened. Soriano provided some more late-inning heroics, hitting a two-run shot in the eighth inning to put the Cardinals away for a come-from-behind 8-7 victory.
Our very own lighning rod continues to shine late in games, and memories of his three previous strike outs were quickly erased. For people who have spent the past 100 years pining, we seem to have short memories when it comes to our left fielder.
But before we annoint Soriano and the Cubs as saviors of sanity on the North Side, let's explore the journey they took to get to the eighth. Carlos Zambrano struggled mightily, giving up all seven runs and blowing an early 3-0 lead. However, since the bullpen was so depleted, Zambrano had to suffer through seven innings and 109 pitches. The home run proved to be his undoing, as he gave up two to Ryan Ludwick and another to Brian Barden.
And for our next activity, please pick out Brian Barden from this lineup. Can't? Yeah, that's what we thought.
But enough about Zambrano. Our offense saved us, refusing to acquiesce. Derrek Lee continued to impress, as did Micah Hoffpauir, and Kosuke Fukudome continued to set the table at the top of the order. Aramis Ramirez and Geovany Soto also got in on the action, coming up with the kind of situational hitting that the Cubs rarely seem to possess.
Simply put, the offense showed more character than James Cromwell, and Soriano put the Cardinals away on a no-doubter.
Carlos Marmol and Aaron Heilman also deserve their Kudos bars, as Heilman bridged the gap to the ninth, and Marmol continued to make us second guess this Kevin Gregg experiment. After walking the lead off batter and plunking Albert Pujols, Marmol resumed filthiness and evened the series at 1-1. Nausea, and potential ealry-onset insanity, avoided.
Too bad the morning's fish food beat the Cardinals to the punch.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Ladies and Gentlemen, Milton Bradley
Well, Milton Bradley gave the Cubs what they wanted. Sort of.
Bradley, pinch hitting, was ejected in the sixth inning after arguing balls and strikes during his Wrigley Field debut. Going up in the count 3-0 with the bases loaded, Bradley saw the count shift in Adam Wainwright's favor. Wainwright's 3-2 pitch was low, called a strike, and Bradley didn't hesitate letting home plate umpire Larry Vanover know how he felt. Bradley was immediately tossed.
Fantastic.
Last year's team was outstanding. Great starting rotation. Great offense. Solid bullpen. Still, outside of Carlos Zambrano, where was the intensity? Quick hint: it wasn't there.
Now, I'm not questioning the passion of these players. Derrek Lee is one hell of a competitor. Center field walls have come to fear Reed Johnson. And Kerry Wood can strike out some batters with a stare. But to win at a championship level, you need that Dennis Rodman. You need that Ozzie Guillen [did I really just say that?]. They put up great numbers, but also bring that intangible, always-on-display demeanor that enchants fans and makes opponents question themselves.
Piss and vinegar. Vim and vigor. It's not an exact science, but there are proven results. You need that visible, outspoken tenacity. Bradley brings that, and we saw it today. Is it just a distraction though? No, not at this point. Bradley hasn't been hitting this season in limited time, but he's getting on base. That's what he was brought in for. And as far as ejections go, one here or there, especially if it comes in a pinch-hitting situation, isn't going to kill a team.
Sure, the 2008 Cubs displayed a great sense of camaraderie, and the last thing we need is another dugout boxing ring match, but there wasn't a "win now at any cost" mentality, and Bradley brings that to the team. Thus, his Wrigley Field debut had the sold-out crowd on its feet.
However, I'm sure both Bradley and the Cubs wanted a different outcome.
Bradley's strike out had lasting effects on the game. With the score tied 4-4, Alfonso Soriano followed up Bradley with a pop out to left field. Scoring opportunity wasted, St. Louis battered the Cubs bullpen some more, surging ahead for a 7-4 win.
Sean Marshall, making his first start of the season, gave us what we expect from a back of the rotation starter: five innings of three-run ball. That isn't Cy Young stuff, but it should be good enough to get the win. Given the misadventures of the bullpen though, it's hard to imagine Jeff Samardzija sitting around in the minors for too long. Whether that means he starts and Marshall is shifted to the bullpen, or vice versa, I don't know. Stay tuned.
Kosuke Fukudome bailed Marhsll out and put the Cubs in position to win with a three-run homer in the fifth inning, erasing an early 3-1 deficit. Aaron Heilman promptly gave that lead away, courtesy of a Khalil Greene home run in the sixth inning. The Cubs never recovered in the opening game of a crucial, four game early season series. David Patton added to the damage, issuing two walks and giving up two runs in his first poor outing of the season. Angel Guzman wasn't too sharp either.
Things weren't much better on the other side of the ball. Micah Hoffpauir got the start in right field, but wasn't able to do much at the plate, finishing 0-for-4. Outside of Fukudome, Aramis Ramirez was the only player with two hits.
But at the end of the day, you have to walk away knowing that the best thing that could've happened in a loss was learning about the character of this year's Cubs. While Bradley may be suspended, that's a tenacity that we want, as long as it doesn't hurt us too much in the long run. That's a fine line, but one that I'm sure Bradley and Lou can walk at this stage of their careers.
Bradley, pinch hitting, was ejected in the sixth inning after arguing balls and strikes during his Wrigley Field debut. Going up in the count 3-0 with the bases loaded, Bradley saw the count shift in Adam Wainwright's favor. Wainwright's 3-2 pitch was low, called a strike, and Bradley didn't hesitate letting home plate umpire Larry Vanover know how he felt. Bradley was immediately tossed.
Fantastic.
Last year's team was outstanding. Great starting rotation. Great offense. Solid bullpen. Still, outside of Carlos Zambrano, where was the intensity? Quick hint: it wasn't there.
Now, I'm not questioning the passion of these players. Derrek Lee is one hell of a competitor. Center field walls have come to fear Reed Johnson. And Kerry Wood can strike out some batters with a stare. But to win at a championship level, you need that Dennis Rodman. You need that Ozzie Guillen [did I really just say that?]. They put up great numbers, but also bring that intangible, always-on-display demeanor that enchants fans and makes opponents question themselves.
Piss and vinegar. Vim and vigor. It's not an exact science, but there are proven results. You need that visible, outspoken tenacity. Bradley brings that, and we saw it today. Is it just a distraction though? No, not at this point. Bradley hasn't been hitting this season in limited time, but he's getting on base. That's what he was brought in for. And as far as ejections go, one here or there, especially if it comes in a pinch-hitting situation, isn't going to kill a team.
Sure, the 2008 Cubs displayed a great sense of camaraderie, and the last thing we need is another dugout boxing ring match, but there wasn't a "win now at any cost" mentality, and Bradley brings that to the team. Thus, his Wrigley Field debut had the sold-out crowd on its feet.
However, I'm sure both Bradley and the Cubs wanted a different outcome.
Bradley's strike out had lasting effects on the game. With the score tied 4-4, Alfonso Soriano followed up Bradley with a pop out to left field. Scoring opportunity wasted, St. Louis battered the Cubs bullpen some more, surging ahead for a 7-4 win.
Sean Marshall, making his first start of the season, gave us what we expect from a back of the rotation starter: five innings of three-run ball. That isn't Cy Young stuff, but it should be good enough to get the win. Given the misadventures of the bullpen though, it's hard to imagine Jeff Samardzija sitting around in the minors for too long. Whether that means he starts and Marshall is shifted to the bullpen, or vice versa, I don't know. Stay tuned.
Kosuke Fukudome bailed Marhsll out and put the Cubs in position to win with a three-run homer in the fifth inning, erasing an early 3-1 deficit. Aaron Heilman promptly gave that lead away, courtesy of a Khalil Greene home run in the sixth inning. The Cubs never recovered in the opening game of a crucial, four game early season series. David Patton added to the damage, issuing two walks and giving up two runs in his first poor outing of the season. Angel Guzman wasn't too sharp either.
Things weren't much better on the other side of the ball. Micah Hoffpauir got the start in right field, but wasn't able to do much at the plate, finishing 0-for-4. Outside of Fukudome, Aramis Ramirez was the only player with two hits.
But at the end of the day, you have to walk away knowing that the best thing that could've happened in a loss was learning about the character of this year's Cubs. While Bradley may be suspended, that's a tenacity that we want, as long as it doesn't hurt us too much in the long run. That's a fine line, but one that I'm sure Bradley and Lou can walk at this stage of their careers.
Marquis Shines, Causes Dugout Indigestion
Jason Marquis? Really?
The oft-maligned, former back of the rotation starter for the Cubs returned to Wrigley Field in Cy Young form, helping the Rockies avoid the two-game series sweep with a 5-2 win over his former employers.
Marquis dazzled from the outset, holding the Cubs to one run over seven innings. The victor [Jason Marquis? Really?] only issued two free passes, which probably gave Lou a serious bout of indigestion since Marquis' M.O. last year was turning the base paths into a carousel of walkers. That's my theory at least. Even worse, he was responsible for the Rockies first two RBIs. Yes, Jason Marquis has more RBIs than our starting catcher and reigning Rookie of the Year.
Jason Marquis? Really?
The eye-searing devastation didn't end there though. Enter Rich Harden. Harden barely escaped three innings, topping out at 92 pitches before he was pulled for the so-far-really-reliable David Patton. With two appearances under his belt now, Patton has cruised through four innings, giving up only one run, a meaningless solo home run that came against the first major league batter he ever faced. The feel-good Spring Training sensation continues.
But back to Harden. I'm not letting him off that easily. Did you see that first inning? Harden looked as if he had a personal vendetta against the Rockies, as if they knocked him out of the postseason, not the Dodgers. Harden struck out the side with stuff so filthy, disgruntled Rockies mothers labeled it pornographic.
The second inning was a bit different, however. Harden struck out the first tbatter he faced, but found himself in trouble after two walks and an infiled single. True to form, Harden struck out the next batter he faced, bringing Jason Marquis to the plate.
Now, Marquis is a great hitting pitcher, the 2005 National League Silver Slugger winner at his position. And frankly, Reed Johnson should have made that catch in center on Marquis' flare hit. But c'mon Rich. The pitcher? Jason Marquis? Really? Harden was terrific in Milwaukee, showing the same form that put him in the conversation as the best trade in baseball last year. But Harden got himself into trouble by putting runners on and running up his pitch count, not exactly music to Lou and Larry's ears. Hopefully, nothing more than a blip on the road.
[Before you laugh that statement off, Sabathia fans out there will want to look at the numbers. While Sabathia threw more innings and finished with seven complete games, Harden sported a 1.78 ERA over 12 starts that compares favorably to Sabathia's 1.65 ERA over 17 starts. While both floundered in the postseason, they both were HUGE midseason acquisitions. Thus, we hold Harden to an incredibly high standard.]
Harden's short outing wasn't the only games only noticable occurence. The other was Derrek Lee. I think, just maybe, we're seeing Lee come to life. It couldn't have come at a better time for both Lee and the Cubs. With Lous strapping on Micah Hoffpauir's batting gloves, Lee went 3-for-4 with a ninth inning home run that helped put the Cubs in position to win this game [more on that later].
As I've said, we need Lee to drive the ball, and that home run was a good sign, especially since it came at a key situation in the game. "Clutch" is a hard statistic to define, but that's where Lee's performance would rank. On a day when the offense was stagnant, Lee roared. Hopefully, this is only the beginning.
[Side note: True to form, Hoffpauir chimed in with a pinch-hit double. Lee's timing couldn't have been any better.]
This loss was a lot toughrer to stomach after watching the ninth. Angel Guzman gave up a run in the top-half of the inning, and after Lee's home run to lead off their half of the ninth, Mike Fontenot walked and Johnson singled to put two on with nobody out.
Enter hysterics.
Fontenot was then thrown out at third on a base running gaffe, and our hard-luck catcher Geo Soto reintroduced Cubs fans to the game-ending double play. Like I said, "clutch" is a hard statistic to define, but I can make an exception here. This was about as close to clutch as Meg Ryan is to her golden years. Yeah, I went there.
So, to recap: Harden got his bad start out of the way and will resume his Cy Young campiagn next week. Instead of slamming his helmet into the dirt, Derrek Lee is hammering pitches into the bleachers. Geo Soto? Frigidly cold. Luis Vizcaino , the man the Rockies shipped us after we begged them to take this game's MVP off of out hands? A scoreless inning. And Jason Marquis? The game's MVP on the mound and at the plate. Yeah, that about sums up a 5-2 loss. Well, there is one more thing:
Jason Marquis? Really?
The oft-maligned, former back of the rotation starter for the Cubs returned to Wrigley Field in Cy Young form, helping the Rockies avoid the two-game series sweep with a 5-2 win over his former employers.
Marquis dazzled from the outset, holding the Cubs to one run over seven innings. The victor [Jason Marquis? Really?] only issued two free passes, which probably gave Lou a serious bout of indigestion since Marquis' M.O. last year was turning the base paths into a carousel of walkers. That's my theory at least. Even worse, he was responsible for the Rockies first two RBIs. Yes, Jason Marquis has more RBIs than our starting catcher and reigning Rookie of the Year.
Jason Marquis? Really?
The eye-searing devastation didn't end there though. Enter Rich Harden. Harden barely escaped three innings, topping out at 92 pitches before he was pulled for the so-far-really-reliable David Patton. With two appearances under his belt now, Patton has cruised through four innings, giving up only one run, a meaningless solo home run that came against the first major league batter he ever faced. The feel-good Spring Training sensation continues.
But back to Harden. I'm not letting him off that easily. Did you see that first inning? Harden looked as if he had a personal vendetta against the Rockies, as if they knocked him out of the postseason, not the Dodgers. Harden struck out the side with stuff so filthy, disgruntled Rockies mothers labeled it pornographic.
The second inning was a bit different, however. Harden struck out the first tbatter he faced, but found himself in trouble after two walks and an infiled single. True to form, Harden struck out the next batter he faced, bringing Jason Marquis to the plate.
Now, Marquis is a great hitting pitcher, the 2005 National League Silver Slugger winner at his position. And frankly, Reed Johnson should have made that catch in center on Marquis' flare hit. But c'mon Rich. The pitcher? Jason Marquis? Really? Harden was terrific in Milwaukee, showing the same form that put him in the conversation as the best trade in baseball last year. But Harden got himself into trouble by putting runners on and running up his pitch count, not exactly music to Lou and Larry's ears. Hopefully, nothing more than a blip on the road.
[Before you laugh that statement off, Sabathia fans out there will want to look at the numbers. While Sabathia threw more innings and finished with seven complete games, Harden sported a 1.78 ERA over 12 starts that compares favorably to Sabathia's 1.65 ERA over 17 starts. While both floundered in the postseason, they both were HUGE midseason acquisitions. Thus, we hold Harden to an incredibly high standard.]
Harden's short outing wasn't the only games only noticable occurence. The other was Derrek Lee. I think, just maybe, we're seeing Lee come to life. It couldn't have come at a better time for both Lee and the Cubs. With Lous strapping on Micah Hoffpauir's batting gloves, Lee went 3-for-4 with a ninth inning home run that helped put the Cubs in position to win this game [more on that later].
As I've said, we need Lee to drive the ball, and that home run was a good sign, especially since it came at a key situation in the game. "Clutch" is a hard statistic to define, but that's where Lee's performance would rank. On a day when the offense was stagnant, Lee roared. Hopefully, this is only the beginning.
[Side note: True to form, Hoffpauir chimed in with a pinch-hit double. Lee's timing couldn't have been any better.]
This loss was a lot toughrer to stomach after watching the ninth. Angel Guzman gave up a run in the top-half of the inning, and after Lee's home run to lead off their half of the ninth, Mike Fontenot walked and Johnson singled to put two on with nobody out.
Enter hysterics.
Fontenot was then thrown out at third on a base running gaffe, and our hard-luck catcher Geo Soto reintroduced Cubs fans to the game-ending double play. Like I said, "clutch" is a hard statistic to define, but I can make an exception here. This was about as close to clutch as Meg Ryan is to her golden years. Yeah, I went there.
So, to recap: Harden got his bad start out of the way and will resume his Cy Young campiagn next week. Instead of slamming his helmet into the dirt, Derrek Lee is hammering pitches into the bleachers. Geo Soto? Frigidly cold. Luis Vizcaino , the man the Rockies shipped us after we begged them to take this game's MVP off of out hands? A scoreless inning. And Jason Marquis? The game's MVP on the mound and at the plate. Yeah, that about sums up a 5-2 loss. Well, there is one more thing:
Jason Marquis? Really?
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
"That's what the game needed, more guys like him"
Just when you thought it couldn't get any tougher, the Baseball Gods intervened. Again.
This season has gotten off to a rough start, not because the Nationals haven't won a game or the newly renovated Yankees trail the Blue Jays AND the Orioles, but because of everything that baseball has lost.
Today, baseball lost two of its most interesting personalities, Harry Kalas and Mark "The Bird" Fidrych.
As someone who grew up outside of the Philadelphia area, I didn't know Kalas as the voice of the Phillies, but rather the voice of NFL Films. Kalas found a way to make every team, regardless of their accomplishments, interesting for their fans [As a Bears fan, let's just say we made life tough for Kalas]. His program was an offseason necessity, right up there with the NFL Draft and a training camp holdout.
Still, it was a seasonal right of passage, a necessity. The Hall of Fame broadcaster endeared himself to millions throughout his career, and as ESPN analyst and former Phillie John Kruk noted, Kalas is to sports fans in Philadelphia what Ben Franklin is to local historians. He left an indescribable mark on their culture, and his prowess behind the mic will be sorely missed.
Fidrych was something else. His on-the-field antics stand out as some of the oddest, even in 2009. Nicknamed The Bird because of his lanky demeanor and throwing style, Fidrych became an instant classic and helped revive baseball in Detroit by vehemently talking to the ball during games and getting down on his knees and playing with the dirt on the mound.
Fidyrch was more than a goof though.
Any teammate will tell you that he was genuine, a terrific personality to have in the clubhouse. He was someone who wasn't afraid to put himself out there, even if it was really, really far out there. Additionally, he had the numbers to back it up. In his 1976 Rookie of the Year campaign, Fidrych went 19-9 with a 2.34 ERA, numbers which helped earn him the start at the All-Star Game. The real jaw-dropper was this nugget though: that season, Fidrych finished with 24 complete games. Finding starters who can START 24 games is impressive.
Injuries derailed his career, and he spent only five years in the majors, going 29-19. However, those numbers didn't derail his popularity. During a comeback bid in the minors years later, he was still selling out games. Immortalized by his animated personality, there isn't a more famous 29-game winner in baseball history.
This season has gotten off to a rough start, not because the Nationals haven't won a game or the newly renovated Yankees trail the Blue Jays AND the Orioles, but because of everything that baseball has lost.
Today, baseball lost two of its most interesting personalities, Harry Kalas and Mark "The Bird" Fidrych.
As someone who grew up outside of the Philadelphia area, I didn't know Kalas as the voice of the Phillies, but rather the voice of NFL Films. Kalas found a way to make every team, regardless of their accomplishments, interesting for their fans [As a Bears fan, let's just say we made life tough for Kalas]. His program was an offseason necessity, right up there with the NFL Draft and a training camp holdout.
Still, it was a seasonal right of passage, a necessity. The Hall of Fame broadcaster endeared himself to millions throughout his career, and as ESPN analyst and former Phillie John Kruk noted, Kalas is to sports fans in Philadelphia what Ben Franklin is to local historians. He left an indescribable mark on their culture, and his prowess behind the mic will be sorely missed.
Fidrych was something else. His on-the-field antics stand out as some of the oddest, even in 2009. Nicknamed The Bird because of his lanky demeanor and throwing style, Fidrych became an instant classic and helped revive baseball in Detroit by vehemently talking to the ball during games and getting down on his knees and playing with the dirt on the mound.
Fidyrch was more than a goof though.
Any teammate will tell you that he was genuine, a terrific personality to have in the clubhouse. He was someone who wasn't afraid to put himself out there, even if it was really, really far out there. Additionally, he had the numbers to back it up. In his 1976 Rookie of the Year campaign, Fidrych went 19-9 with a 2.34 ERA, numbers which helped earn him the start at the All-Star Game. The real jaw-dropper was this nugget though: that season, Fidrych finished with 24 complete games. Finding starters who can START 24 games is impressive.
Injuries derailed his career, and he spent only five years in the majors, going 29-19. However, those numbers didn't derail his popularity. During a comeback bid in the minors years later, he was still selling out games. Immortalized by his animated personality, there isn't a more famous 29-game winner in baseball history.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Return of the Ted
I would love to talk about Ted Lilly. After all, it's my goal this season to see how many headlines I can force Theodore's name into. But sometimes, the Baseball Gods intervene and present you with a story so odd, so jarring, yet so fitting, that you have to give it precedence.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Cub fan.
Regardless of what baseball's most masochistic delusionists do to open the season, it's hard to outperform a Ted Lilly outing like this one. Lilly went 6 2/3 without giving up a run, carrying a no-hitter into the seventh. It was a drastic departure from the homer-happy performance that Lilly put up in Houston, probably due to his lack of run support on a dreary, the wind-is-blowing-in-and-I-dare-Glenallen Hill-to-try-to-drive-one-out-in-this-crap home opener.
[Side note: please, check out that Glenallen Hill video. On May 11, 2000, Hill became the only player to hit a pitched ball onto the roof of a building across the street from the left field wall of Wrigley Field. That's skill kids.]
Lilly was exceptional, giving us the kind of showing that we needed in the postseason [I stand by the decision to start Dempster, Zambrano, and Harden, but you have to wonder if our hottest big-game pitcher could've won us a game]. That was a mid-season form performance, which begs the question, how did Lilly and Soriano finally figure out studliness at the beginning of the season? Suddenly, never smiling and hopping have become in vogue on the North Side.
Speaking of Soriano, the Cubs lead-off aficionado went 2-for-4 with a [gasp!] walk and a run in another solid offensive performance. Soriano is doing everything we expect from him at the plate, sporting an OBP of .389 and limiting himself to seven strikeouts while coaxing four walks. While Soriano has never walked more than he's struck out in a season, if he can keep that ratio close to one, we're going to have a great top of the order. Now, if only the middle could get it together.
[Yet another side note: just to put Soriano's career performance in perspective, Soriano walked 67 times in 2006, his highest single season total. He struck out 160 times that season, which was also a career high. Hall of Famer Tony Gwynn only struck out more than he walked once - 1982, his rookie year. Gwynn's career numbers include a staggering 790 walks and only 434 strikeouts, including only one three-strike out game in his career. Until Soriano scratches those numbers, I'm not willing to dub him as "disciplined," but he's certainly trying this year.]
The middle of the order, hampered by the loss of Aramis Ramirez, Milton Bradley and Geovany Soto, was a makeshift creation brought to you by Lou Piniella. Lou's scramble proved affective, as Lee finally broke out of his slump with a 2-for-3 performance that also included two walks and an RBI. Fukudome continued to erase or memories of the screwdriver maneuver with a 1-for-2 performance that included an RBI and three walks [yes, Fukudome almost eclipsed Soriano's seasaon walk total in one game].
Outside of Lilly, Lee's performance was the most crucial. While Hoffpauir can certainly hit with the best of them, Lee brings a defensive presence to the team that Hoffpauir never will. Why do you think Ramirez has turned into a Gold Glove caliber third baseman? Yeah, he's made remarkable strides at third, but he's also throwing to Lee. The same goes for Theriot, the pitching staff, and whoever we have plugged in at second. If Lee's hitting, Lou's going to rest a bit easier at night knowing that spot in the order is solidified.
While on the subject of Lee, there's something else I want to address. Derrek Lee will never have another 2005 season. That was a remarkable year, and it set the bar a bit high. Still, we need an improvement in his power numbers. By that do I mean home runs? Not necessarily. Lee is at his best when he's driving the ball, and if that means doubles into the gaps, I'll be thrilled.
We need Lee's RBI totals to jump, as well as his average and OBP, especially when we have so many guys getting on base ahead of him. Lee's high double play total from last season was due in large part to having so many baserunners on before he hit. So Lee driving the ball into the outfield is a win-win: more RBIs, fewer double plays. Hopefully this is a positive sign.
Still, there was one awfully distressing aspect of the game: we left 26 runners on base. While you can attribute this to the loss of our thumpers, it's still a gaudy number. We're not going to get outings like this every game, so we need to capitalize on having that many baserunners. Yes, the wind was playing games with the ball, and yes, Ubaldo Jimenez isn't a bottom of the barrel starter, but these are the kind of numbers that lose you games.
If you strand that many runners, you're not going to win in the postseason, if you even make it there. After all, Soriano can't bail you out if he's on base.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Cub fan.
Regardless of what baseball's most masochistic delusionists do to open the season, it's hard to outperform a Ted Lilly outing like this one. Lilly went 6 2/3 without giving up a run, carrying a no-hitter into the seventh. It was a drastic departure from the homer-happy performance that Lilly put up in Houston, probably due to his lack of run support on a dreary, the wind-is-blowing-in-and-I-dare-Glenallen Hill-to-try-to-drive-one-out-in-this-crap home opener.
[Side note: please, check out that Glenallen Hill video. On May 11, 2000, Hill became the only player to hit a pitched ball onto the roof of a building across the street from the left field wall of Wrigley Field. That's skill kids.]
Lilly was exceptional, giving us the kind of showing that we needed in the postseason [I stand by the decision to start Dempster, Zambrano, and Harden, but you have to wonder if our hottest big-game pitcher could've won us a game]. That was a mid-season form performance, which begs the question, how did Lilly and Soriano finally figure out studliness at the beginning of the season? Suddenly, never smiling and hopping have become in vogue on the North Side.
Speaking of Soriano, the Cubs lead-off aficionado went 2-for-4 with a [gasp!] walk and a run in another solid offensive performance. Soriano is doing everything we expect from him at the plate, sporting an OBP of .389 and limiting himself to seven strikeouts while coaxing four walks. While Soriano has never walked more than he's struck out in a season, if he can keep that ratio close to one, we're going to have a great top of the order. Now, if only the middle could get it together.
[Yet another side note: just to put Soriano's career performance in perspective, Soriano walked 67 times in 2006, his highest single season total. He struck out 160 times that season, which was also a career high. Hall of Famer Tony Gwynn only struck out more than he walked once - 1982, his rookie year. Gwynn's career numbers include a staggering 790 walks and only 434 strikeouts, including only one three-strike out game in his career. Until Soriano scratches those numbers, I'm not willing to dub him as "disciplined," but he's certainly trying this year.]
The middle of the order, hampered by the loss of Aramis Ramirez, Milton Bradley and Geovany Soto, was a makeshift creation brought to you by Lou Piniella. Lou's scramble proved affective, as Lee finally broke out of his slump with a 2-for-3 performance that also included two walks and an RBI. Fukudome continued to erase or memories of the screwdriver maneuver with a 1-for-2 performance that included an RBI and three walks [yes, Fukudome almost eclipsed Soriano's seasaon walk total in one game].
Outside of Lilly, Lee's performance was the most crucial. While Hoffpauir can certainly hit with the best of them, Lee brings a defensive presence to the team that Hoffpauir never will. Why do you think Ramirez has turned into a Gold Glove caliber third baseman? Yeah, he's made remarkable strides at third, but he's also throwing to Lee. The same goes for Theriot, the pitching staff, and whoever we have plugged in at second. If Lee's hitting, Lou's going to rest a bit easier at night knowing that spot in the order is solidified.
While on the subject of Lee, there's something else I want to address. Derrek Lee will never have another 2005 season. That was a remarkable year, and it set the bar a bit high. Still, we need an improvement in his power numbers. By that do I mean home runs? Not necessarily. Lee is at his best when he's driving the ball, and if that means doubles into the gaps, I'll be thrilled.
We need Lee's RBI totals to jump, as well as his average and OBP, especially when we have so many guys getting on base ahead of him. Lee's high double play total from last season was due in large part to having so many baserunners on before he hit. So Lee driving the ball into the outfield is a win-win: more RBIs, fewer double plays. Hopefully this is a positive sign.
Still, there was one awfully distressing aspect of the game: we left 26 runners on base. While you can attribute this to the loss of our thumpers, it's still a gaudy number. We're not going to get outings like this every game, so we need to capitalize on having that many baserunners. Yes, the wind was playing games with the ball, and yes, Ubaldo Jimenez isn't a bottom of the barrel starter, but these are the kind of numbers that lose you games.
If you strand that many runners, you're not going to win in the postseason, if you even make it there. After all, Soriano can't bail you out if he's on base.
Rare Air: Johnson Saves Cubs, Eligible For Dunk Contest
Today, I'm declaring this a bullpen free zone [due in large part to last night's thrilling conclusion, which must have felt similar similar to a 2-for1 colonoscopy and prostate exam special in a back alley].
Ryan Dempster loves Reed Johnson. Reed Johnson loves Ryan Dempster. After all, Dempster was on the mound when Johnson introduced himself to Cubs fans last season against the Nationals with what may have been the Cubs' defensive play of the year. Just in case Dempster forgot, Johnson reminded him that he's still patrolling real estate on occasion.
Replacing an injured Milton Bradley [too soon, but not unexpected], Johnson became the object of Dempster's affection again with last night's heroics. In case you didn't see it, here it is again. And again. And again. You get the picture.
EHarmony.com jokes aside, Johnson's catch wasn't the only key to a crucial win. While he did prevent a potential grand slam with a catch OVER the wall in center, prompting even Prince Fielder to tip his cap, it was the Cubs offense that made tonight's win possible.
Please hold your applause until the end.
Alfonso Soriano, Kosuke Fukudome and Ryan Theriot continued to worship the OBP stat, with Soriano leading off with another home run, Fukudome going 1-for-3 with two walks and an RBI, and Theriot finishing with yet another 2-for-4 performance that also included a walk.
Last night was also a great example of the Cubs' tremendous patience at the plate. They coaxed 10 walks, including six from starter Jeff Suppan. Whether this is due to hitting coach Gerald Perry, dumb luck, or a desire to get opponents onto as many Baseball Blooper reels as possible, it's working.
The Brewers essentially beat themselves by walking in runs and putting the lead off man on [Joey Gathwright is arguably our fastest player, and they walked him to lead off an inning, failing to realize that pitches over the plate may prevent him from stealing bases], but the Cubs capitalized. Johnson took care of the rest.
Dempster wasn't at his best [Fielder's blast would have tied the game 6-6] but he was good enough over six innings, which is fine when you can put that many runs on the board. He even scored a run for good measure. Maybe he was trying to impress Johnson, I don't know. But he's going to have to do a lot more if Johnson keeps making these plays, which could make him eligible for the NBA Dunk Contest if David Stern gets ahold of this tape.
Seriously.
If Nate Robinson can win, I think Reed Johnson has a shot. It's no coincidence that his pose as he caught the ball resembled Chicago's recent Hall of Fame inductee. No coincidence at all
Alright, you can applaud now.
[You see, even I can give the bullpen a night off.]
Ryan Dempster loves Reed Johnson. Reed Johnson loves Ryan Dempster. After all, Dempster was on the mound when Johnson introduced himself to Cubs fans last season against the Nationals with what may have been the Cubs' defensive play of the year. Just in case Dempster forgot, Johnson reminded him that he's still patrolling real estate on occasion.
Replacing an injured Milton Bradley [too soon, but not unexpected], Johnson became the object of Dempster's affection again with last night's heroics. In case you didn't see it, here it is again. And again. And again. You get the picture.
EHarmony.com jokes aside, Johnson's catch wasn't the only key to a crucial win. While he did prevent a potential grand slam with a catch OVER the wall in center, prompting even Prince Fielder to tip his cap, it was the Cubs offense that made tonight's win possible.
Please hold your applause until the end.
Alfonso Soriano, Kosuke Fukudome and Ryan Theriot continued to worship the OBP stat, with Soriano leading off with another home run, Fukudome going 1-for-3 with two walks and an RBI, and Theriot finishing with yet another 2-for-4 performance that also included a walk.
Last night was also a great example of the Cubs' tremendous patience at the plate. They coaxed 10 walks, including six from starter Jeff Suppan. Whether this is due to hitting coach Gerald Perry, dumb luck, or a desire to get opponents onto as many Baseball Blooper reels as possible, it's working.
The Brewers essentially beat themselves by walking in runs and putting the lead off man on [Joey Gathwright is arguably our fastest player, and they walked him to lead off an inning, failing to realize that pitches over the plate may prevent him from stealing bases], but the Cubs capitalized. Johnson took care of the rest.
Dempster wasn't at his best [Fielder's blast would have tied the game 6-6] but he was good enough over six innings, which is fine when you can put that many runs on the board. He even scored a run for good measure. Maybe he was trying to impress Johnson, I don't know. But he's going to have to do a lot more if Johnson keeps making these plays, which could make him eligible for the NBA Dunk Contest if David Stern gets ahold of this tape.
Seriously.
If Nate Robinson can win, I think Reed Johnson has a shot. It's no coincidence that his pose as he caught the ball resembled Chicago's recent Hall of Fame inductee. No coincidence at all
Alright, you can applaud now.
[You see, even I can give the bullpen a night off.]
Sunday, April 12, 2009
More Marmol-ade Please
Back in the cradle of elementary school, the DARE program taught us that one of the best ways to say no was to "act like a broken record," just repeating "no" until the older kids on the playground became annoyed and walked away or just forced the cigarette in your mouth anyway.
Enter my broken record: welcome to our neverending discussion of the bullpen. Side effects may include walking away annoyed and/or forcing cigarettes in this writer's mouth.
Alright, pull on your hard hats and take that all-too-necessary deep breath: the bullpen gave it their best shot. They tried and tried and tried, but they just couldn't give this game away. Do you remember the scene in Bull Durham where Crash tells the batter what pitch Nuke is going to throw as a way of punishing Nuke? I'm convinced the bullpen is trying to punish us.
Angel Guzman lost his touch. Neal Cotts was Neal Cotts, circa 2009. Aaron Heilman apparently thought he was still a Met pitching in September [In Heilman's defense, he only allowed inherited baserunners to score. Then again, how will that same excuse sound in October when our offense has gone dormant and Lou is having a coronary?]. Yeah, Zambrano didn't have his best stuff, struggling through six innings [and a whopping 118 pitches] while giving up three runs, but he didn't deserve to watch his game get squandered like this.
Thankfully, in rode Alfonso Soriano to a swell of trumpets and fanfare.
[Side note: that sentence ranks right up there with looking for footage of Game 4 of the 1929 World Series as things I didn't expect to say or do in 2009]
Soriano provided the late inning heroics, sending the first pitch he saw into orbit, with the expected landing in Lake Michigan coming any day now. Soriano bailed everyone out. Again.
Earlier in the game, Soriano beat out a grounder on what would have been an inning-ending double play, allowing Little Mike Fontenot to score. The run tied the game 3-3, and while the Cubs sent the Brewers an early Easter gift in the form of two runs a few minutes later, both of Soriano's plays were pivotal.
But don't count your bratwursts before they run.
Carlos Marmol was spectacular in the closer's role, giving us a break from Kevin Gregg and Kevin Gregg a break from Kevin Gregg. The kid did surrender a hit, but he didn't issue any free passes. He didn't allow any runs. He walked off the mound with the lead. He saved Easter. Who knows, maybe he even cured cancer.
Aside from Soriano and Marmol, also joining the parade was Kosuke Fukudome with a 2-for-5 night that included two RBIs, Ryan Theriot and his 2-for-4 performance that didn't include an error, and Koyie Hill who finished with one hit and a whole lot of lost patience. Without the contributions of these fine individuals, none of this would have been possible.
Unfortunately, due to these hard times, my first bypass surgery has been rescheduled for my 35th birthday. Have I mentioned that I miss Kid K?
Enter my broken record: welcome to our neverending discussion of the bullpen. Side effects may include walking away annoyed and/or forcing cigarettes in this writer's mouth.
Alright, pull on your hard hats and take that all-too-necessary deep breath: the bullpen gave it their best shot. They tried and tried and tried, but they just couldn't give this game away. Do you remember the scene in Bull Durham where Crash tells the batter what pitch Nuke is going to throw as a way of punishing Nuke? I'm convinced the bullpen is trying to punish us.
Angel Guzman lost his touch. Neal Cotts was Neal Cotts, circa 2009. Aaron Heilman apparently thought he was still a Met pitching in September [In Heilman's defense, he only allowed inherited baserunners to score. Then again, how will that same excuse sound in October when our offense has gone dormant and Lou is having a coronary?]. Yeah, Zambrano didn't have his best stuff, struggling through six innings [and a whopping 118 pitches] while giving up three runs, but he didn't deserve to watch his game get squandered like this.
Thankfully, in rode Alfonso Soriano to a swell of trumpets and fanfare.
[Side note: that sentence ranks right up there with looking for footage of Game 4 of the 1929 World Series as things I didn't expect to say or do in 2009]
Soriano provided the late inning heroics, sending the first pitch he saw into orbit, with the expected landing in Lake Michigan coming any day now. Soriano bailed everyone out. Again.
Earlier in the game, Soriano beat out a grounder on what would have been an inning-ending double play, allowing Little Mike Fontenot to score. The run tied the game 3-3, and while the Cubs sent the Brewers an early Easter gift in the form of two runs a few minutes later, both of Soriano's plays were pivotal.
But don't count your bratwursts before they run.
Carlos Marmol was spectacular in the closer's role, giving us a break from Kevin Gregg and Kevin Gregg a break from Kevin Gregg. The kid did surrender a hit, but he didn't issue any free passes. He didn't allow any runs. He walked off the mound with the lead. He saved Easter. Who knows, maybe he even cured cancer.
Aside from Soriano and Marmol, also joining the parade was Kosuke Fukudome with a 2-for-5 night that included two RBIs, Ryan Theriot and his 2-for-4 performance that didn't include an error, and Koyie Hill who finished with one hit and a whole lot of lost patience. Without the contributions of these fine individuals, none of this would have been possible.
Unfortunately, due to these hard times, my first bypass surgery has been rescheduled for my 35th birthday. Have I mentioned that I miss Kid K?
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Y(L)ou Decide: Ketchup or Mustard
Time has an interesting knack of helping put things into perspective. For example, who knew Little Mike Fontenot was going to be the most important piece of the Sammy Sosa trade in 2005. The minor leaguer was so far off the radar that ESPN didn't even mention Fontenot in its report. Don't look now, but he's our starting second baseman.
Thus, time was exactly what I needed after Friday's 4-3 loss to the Brewers.
According to WCVB Boston, the truck driver responsible for delivering $43,000 worth of ketchup to Fenway Park for opening day went rogue, stashing the shipment at a truck stop in Tennessee. Had Monday's Opening Day game not been cancelled due to the weather, Boston might have been the site of another condiment-induced rebellion.
Maybe it was the humor, maybe it was the audacity; whatever the case, a few packs of ketchup helped soften what was a frustratingly awful blow. Faltering as advertised, Aaron Heilman, Neal Cotts, Sean Marshall, and Kevin Gregg were all ineffective after Rich Harden's scintiallating season debut. Harden went six innings, giving up only one earned run and striking out 10.
It's hard, and often times unfair to single out one player or one play that determines the outcome of a game. After all, there are nine innings and nine men on the field with 27 outs to work with. However, it's even harder to shy away from what happened with Kevin Gregg and Ryan Theriot.
Unfortunately for Gregg, Spring Training is over. The guy who didn't allow a run before the real lights came on has allowed three earned runs in three appearances. The problem appears to be comfortability. Gregg hasn't looked at ease, as his walk to Chris Duffy showed. Giving up hits in an outing is one thing; walking reserve outfielders seeing their first action at the plate is another. The final pitch Gregg threw to Duffy was bounced up to the plate. Kind of makes you yearn for Kid K, doesn't it?
The Kevin Gregg experiment is getting awfully old. Lou's justification for keeping Marmol as the setup man so that he can get a few two-inning outings out of him is understandable, but you need someone who gets the job done behind Marmol. Gregg finished the eighth on three pitches, then fell apart in the ninth. You WILL NOT win with a closer that inconsistent. Gregg's leash just got considerably shorter. Did I mention that I miss Kerry Wood?
[Reality checked in and reminded me that Wood has made one appearance this year, allowing one run in an inning of work, striking out three. Not exacly Rolaids Relief kind of stuff.]
Theriot is a different case. The Riot had 14 errors last year, and he picked up two more last night, with his fielder's choice to end the game registering as a judgement error [you have to go for the double play on that one]. His first error and the fielder's choice both gave up runs, ultimately sinking the Cubs, even though Gregg was about as effective as a case of O'Douls.
But Theriot has been sensational at the plate. He went 2-for-3 with a double, meaning he's 7-f0r-12 for the season, walking in all four games as well. Theriot's fielding is hurting the team, but so are Derrek Lee, Milton Bradley, and Aramis Ramirez leaving a combined eight runners on base. I'm giving Theriot a little more leeway than Gregg on this one, but I can't handle many more showings like that.
Last night was the Houston loss, episode two. Getting blown out is one thing, but giving away winnable games, games in which you have a lead after the seventh inning, is unnaceptable. That isn't going to net you a division title, and it certainly isn't going to get you beyond the first round of the playoffs. Gregg and the other kids need to get their acts together, or Lou is going to have to make some tough decisions.
I wish it was just deciding between ketchup or mustard.
Thus, time was exactly what I needed after Friday's 4-3 loss to the Brewers.
According to WCVB Boston, the truck driver responsible for delivering $43,000 worth of ketchup to Fenway Park for opening day went rogue, stashing the shipment at a truck stop in Tennessee. Had Monday's Opening Day game not been cancelled due to the weather, Boston might have been the site of another condiment-induced rebellion.
Maybe it was the humor, maybe it was the audacity; whatever the case, a few packs of ketchup helped soften what was a frustratingly awful blow. Faltering as advertised, Aaron Heilman, Neal Cotts, Sean Marshall, and Kevin Gregg were all ineffective after Rich Harden's scintiallating season debut. Harden went six innings, giving up only one earned run and striking out 10.
It's hard, and often times unfair to single out one player or one play that determines the outcome of a game. After all, there are nine innings and nine men on the field with 27 outs to work with. However, it's even harder to shy away from what happened with Kevin Gregg and Ryan Theriot.
Unfortunately for Gregg, Spring Training is over. The guy who didn't allow a run before the real lights came on has allowed three earned runs in three appearances. The problem appears to be comfortability. Gregg hasn't looked at ease, as his walk to Chris Duffy showed. Giving up hits in an outing is one thing; walking reserve outfielders seeing their first action at the plate is another. The final pitch Gregg threw to Duffy was bounced up to the plate. Kind of makes you yearn for Kid K, doesn't it?
The Kevin Gregg experiment is getting awfully old. Lou's justification for keeping Marmol as the setup man so that he can get a few two-inning outings out of him is understandable, but you need someone who gets the job done behind Marmol. Gregg finished the eighth on three pitches, then fell apart in the ninth. You WILL NOT win with a closer that inconsistent. Gregg's leash just got considerably shorter. Did I mention that I miss Kerry Wood?
[Reality checked in and reminded me that Wood has made one appearance this year, allowing one run in an inning of work, striking out three. Not exacly Rolaids Relief kind of stuff.]
Theriot is a different case. The Riot had 14 errors last year, and he picked up two more last night, with his fielder's choice to end the game registering as a judgement error [you have to go for the double play on that one]. His first error and the fielder's choice both gave up runs, ultimately sinking the Cubs, even though Gregg was about as effective as a case of O'Douls.
But Theriot has been sensational at the plate. He went 2-for-3 with a double, meaning he's 7-f0r-12 for the season, walking in all four games as well. Theriot's fielding is hurting the team, but so are Derrek Lee, Milton Bradley, and Aramis Ramirez leaving a combined eight runners on base. I'm giving Theriot a little more leeway than Gregg on this one, but I can't handle many more showings like that.
Last night was the Houston loss, episode two. Getting blown out is one thing, but giving away winnable games, games in which you have a lead after the seventh inning, is unnaceptable. That isn't going to net you a division title, and it certainly isn't going to get you beyond the first round of the playoffs. Gregg and the other kids need to get their acts together, or Lou is going to have to make some tough decisions.
I wish it was just deciding between ketchup or mustard.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Lucky Number Seven
Christmas has absolutely no business popping up in April.
Sporting red and green jerseys that would've made even Santa nauseous, the Chicago Bulls somehow managed to overcome their fashionably-negligent appearance and drop the 76ers 113-99, improving to 39-40 overall and reducing their magic number to one.
Looking to head back to the playoffs for the fourth time in five years after last year's disappointing absence, the Bulls, according to Tyrus Thomas, are the most dangerous team in the Eastern Conference. Before we get to that nugget, let's tackle last night.
The Bulls continued to impress at that United Center, improving to 27-12 on their own playground. Derrick Rose, Ben Gordon, John Salmons, and the aforementioned Thomas all scored in double figures in addition to the 15 points that Brad Miller chipped in from the bench. With the win, the Bulls pulled a half-game ahead of the Pistons for the 7th seed in the East, a position that will likely match them up against Boston if the current standings hold out.
Now, to Tyrus. The Bulls aren't the trendy pick to win the East. Hell, the Bulls aren't even a trendy pick to win an opening series. However, Tyrus does have a bit of a point. The Bulls are hot right now, and as Sam Smith mentioned over at Bulls.com, this recent shift in the win column feels eerily similar to the stretch runs under Scott Skiles' tenure as head coach.
If they can win a game or two on the road and then get back to the United Center, that really changes the layout of the land. Plus, the Bulls have been able to play with some of the best this season. Remember what they did to Orlando? Houston? Boston? Cleveland at Cleveland? This team tends to play to the level of its competition. The Playoffs would be an ideal location for Tyrus to test that theory.
The comparisons to the recent playoff teams come to a screeching halt there though. The difference between those teams and this year's incarnation? Defense. The Skiles era was defined by grit. That grit, that tenacity, isn't apparent in this year's club. They can score at the highest clip since the Jordan era, but getting into a shootout with Boston?
Hello Ray Allen and Paul Pierce. Your table is ready.
Plus, who's going to stop Kevin Garnett, Dwight Howard, or LeBron James in the post? The playoffs are traditionally a half-court game, which won't allow the Bulls to run as much as they like to. Thus, a half-court defense would go a long way. That's why I can't see the Bulls winning an opening series.
So why is this scenario of an inevitable beat down better than another lottery pick?
Derrick Rose.
This season has been about Rose, and the playoffs won't be an exception. This is about Rose getting experience, learning what it's like to play on the big stage, and seeing who is capable of hanging with the kid. Resigning Gordon is still a huge question mark, as is keeping Hinrich and Salmons. Thus, an audition at the next level is crucial.
It's hard to pick a favorable match up when you look at Cleveland and Boston. Both play well at home, with the Cavs sporting only one loss. Both teams are playoff tested, and both have the necessary star power. Personally, I'd have to go with the Celtics. Garnett isn't at full strength, and LeBron would want nothing more than to show the city of Chicago that he's the second coming of you-know-who on an even brighter stage.
But hey, maybe Tyrus knows what he's talking about. Maybe.
Sporting red and green jerseys that would've made even Santa nauseous, the Chicago Bulls somehow managed to overcome their fashionably-negligent appearance and drop the 76ers 113-99, improving to 39-40 overall and reducing their magic number to one.
Looking to head back to the playoffs for the fourth time in five years after last year's disappointing absence, the Bulls, according to Tyrus Thomas, are the most dangerous team in the Eastern Conference. Before we get to that nugget, let's tackle last night.
The Bulls continued to impress at that United Center, improving to 27-12 on their own playground. Derrick Rose, Ben Gordon, John Salmons, and the aforementioned Thomas all scored in double figures in addition to the 15 points that Brad Miller chipped in from the bench. With the win, the Bulls pulled a half-game ahead of the Pistons for the 7th seed in the East, a position that will likely match them up against Boston if the current standings hold out.
Now, to Tyrus. The Bulls aren't the trendy pick to win the East. Hell, the Bulls aren't even a trendy pick to win an opening series. However, Tyrus does have a bit of a point. The Bulls are hot right now, and as Sam Smith mentioned over at Bulls.com, this recent shift in the win column feels eerily similar to the stretch runs under Scott Skiles' tenure as head coach.
If they can win a game or two on the road and then get back to the United Center, that really changes the layout of the land. Plus, the Bulls have been able to play with some of the best this season. Remember what they did to Orlando? Houston? Boston? Cleveland at Cleveland? This team tends to play to the level of its competition. The Playoffs would be an ideal location for Tyrus to test that theory.
The comparisons to the recent playoff teams come to a screeching halt there though. The difference between those teams and this year's incarnation? Defense. The Skiles era was defined by grit. That grit, that tenacity, isn't apparent in this year's club. They can score at the highest clip since the Jordan era, but getting into a shootout with Boston?
Hello Ray Allen and Paul Pierce. Your table is ready.
Plus, who's going to stop Kevin Garnett, Dwight Howard, or LeBron James in the post? The playoffs are traditionally a half-court game, which won't allow the Bulls to run as much as they like to. Thus, a half-court defense would go a long way. That's why I can't see the Bulls winning an opening series.
So why is this scenario of an inevitable beat down better than another lottery pick?
Derrick Rose.
This season has been about Rose, and the playoffs won't be an exception. This is about Rose getting experience, learning what it's like to play on the big stage, and seeing who is capable of hanging with the kid. Resigning Gordon is still a huge question mark, as is keeping Hinrich and Salmons. Thus, an audition at the next level is crucial.
It's hard to pick a favorable match up when you look at Cleveland and Boston. Both play well at home, with the Cavs sporting only one loss. Both teams are playoff tested, and both have the necessary star power. Personally, I'd have to go with the Celtics. Garnett isn't at full strength, and LeBron would want nothing more than to show the city of Chicago that he's the second coming of you-know-who on an even brighter stage.
But hey, maybe Tyrus knows what he's talking about. Maybe.
"Now you play for another Angels team"
Nick Adenhart wasn't even a year older than me.
Yeah, Adenhart was a terrific young pitcher, the Angels No. 1 prospect according to Baseball America. Yeah, he turned in the biggest performance of his baseball career hours before he died in a car accident. And yeah, his passing signifies a tremendous loss of talent in both the Angels organization and MLB. But all of that pales in comparison when you consider Adenhart's age. That was the most traumatizing part of his passing this week.
Nick Adenhart, at the age of 22 and with so much more to give, is dead. In the eyes of a fellow 22-year old, that's as disturbing as it gets. Unexpected death can happen to anyone, even when you're still in your "invincible" stage of life. If the unexpected can happen to him, it can certainly happen to me. That's the sobering reality leaving its mark on the world of sports, as well as 22-year olds around the world.
Amplifying that is who Adenhart was as a person. In an era where tragedy in sports often involves an athlete acting unprofessionally or inhumanely, Adenhart was a stirring exception. Beloved by his family and the Angels organization, Adenhart was often described as "quiet and thoughtful," qualities not often attributed to some of the more flamboyant, outspoken personalities in professional sports.
He displayed a childhood fervor for the game of baseball, admitting after his perofrmance this week that the fire still burned during his time in the minor leagues, and that same fire carried over into his big league promotion. After the game, he was elated, throwing six shut-out innings against the Oakland A's with his father in the stands. To everyone in the ballpark, including Adenhart and his father, this appeared to be the beginning of something grand.
Hours later, Adenhart was a victim in a tragic car accident that killed two others and left the fourth in intensive care.
Opening Day isn't supposed to be a prelude to such a tragedy. We rant about bullpens and lineups and the rather mundane details of baseball, but we never consider anything like this. Worst of all, there's absolutely no way to prepare for it. It's a harsh reminder that another world revolves around baseball, not the other way around. It's a harsh reminder of what sometimes lies outside of chalk lines and hot dog vendors, bleachers and scoreboards. It's an unfair, harsh reminder of the fragility of life.
Today, and for the foreseeable future, my thoughts and prayers are with Adenhart's family, friends, and the Angels organization. In the baseball community, he won't soon be forgotten.
Yeah, Adenhart was a terrific young pitcher, the Angels No. 1 prospect according to Baseball America. Yeah, he turned in the biggest performance of his baseball career hours before he died in a car accident. And yeah, his passing signifies a tremendous loss of talent in both the Angels organization and MLB. But all of that pales in comparison when you consider Adenhart's age. That was the most traumatizing part of his passing this week.
Nick Adenhart, at the age of 22 and with so much more to give, is dead. In the eyes of a fellow 22-year old, that's as disturbing as it gets. Unexpected death can happen to anyone, even when you're still in your "invincible" stage of life. If the unexpected can happen to him, it can certainly happen to me. That's the sobering reality leaving its mark on the world of sports, as well as 22-year olds around the world.
Amplifying that is who Adenhart was as a person. In an era where tragedy in sports often involves an athlete acting unprofessionally or inhumanely, Adenhart was a stirring exception. Beloved by his family and the Angels organization, Adenhart was often described as "quiet and thoughtful," qualities not often attributed to some of the more flamboyant, outspoken personalities in professional sports.
He displayed a childhood fervor for the game of baseball, admitting after his perofrmance this week that the fire still burned during his time in the minor leagues, and that same fire carried over into his big league promotion. After the game, he was elated, throwing six shut-out innings against the Oakland A's with his father in the stands. To everyone in the ballpark, including Adenhart and his father, this appeared to be the beginning of something grand.
Hours later, Adenhart was a victim in a tragic car accident that killed two others and left the fourth in intensive care.
Opening Day isn't supposed to be a prelude to such a tragedy. We rant about bullpens and lineups and the rather mundane details of baseball, but we never consider anything like this. Worst of all, there's absolutely no way to prepare for it. It's a harsh reminder that another world revolves around baseball, not the other way around. It's a harsh reminder of what sometimes lies outside of chalk lines and hot dog vendors, bleachers and scoreboards. It's an unfair, harsh reminder of the fragility of life.
Today, and for the foreseeable future, my thoughts and prayers are with Adenhart's family, friends, and the Angels organization. In the baseball community, he won't soon be forgotten.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Not So Fast Kosuke
Ladies and gentlemen, Kosuke Fukudome.
The talented but much-maligned outfielder returned to the form that endeared him to Cubs fans early last season, rekindling memories of his 9th-inning heroics against the Brewers on last year's Opening Day.
Fukudome followed up this year's Opening Day's 0-for-4 debacle by going 4-for-5 with a double, a home run, a stolen base, a walk, and four runs scored. Yowzah.
Fukudome helped spark a spanking, as the Cubs somehow managed to outscore the Astros on a night when it seemed every other pitch might be destined for the Crawford Boxes, winning 11-6. Everyone seemed to get in on this one, but let's focus on Fukudome.
First and foremost, let's not get carried away. This is still the guy that displayed an unprecedented level of patience at the plate for the first two months of the season last year [well, unprecedented for recent Cubs history] and somehow managed to lower his batting average every consecutive month.
That HAS to be harder than you think.
Whether it was his regimen, a wrong turn in his acclimation process, or just a love for cork-screwing himself into the ground, Fukudome had many of us wondering if we could get a $48 million reimbursement. I'm not sure if you can fit that many zeroes on a standard check, but after his NLDS performance, I'd be willing to try.
So all things considered, let's look at this realistically: we have one season of MLB to judge this guy on, and two games this season. I'm not ready to anoint him the OBP savior that we did last year [guilty as charged], but by no means am I writing this guy off. We invested in him for a reason, and I'm willing to bet one thing is to blame for his slide last year: his head.
Pitchers don't figure out the kind of patience that Fukudome had at the beginning of the season; hitters ruin it for themselves. Maybe he fell in love with the long ball. Maybe he spent too much time with Joakim Noah. The point is, I'm betting what's under his helmet was responsible for his slide, not the guys on the mound. With Reed Johnson and Bradley on the roster, there's a lot less pressure on Fukudome, and hopefully that will have a positive effect.
As is the case with the bullpen, I'm filing this one under the wait-and-see approach. Stay tuned.
The Quick and The Ted
After everything I've said about Alfonso Soriano, maybe he'll be chasing ME into Lake Michigan.
Soriano continued his torrid start, helping lead the way to an 11-6 win that saw five Cubs finish the game with multiple hits. Kosuke Fukudome turned in an All-Star performance as well with a 4-for-5 showing that included a home run and a double.
The win clinched the series victory for the Cubs. After an off day, they'll continue their season in Milwaukee where Rich Harden faces off against Braden Looper [who miraculously appears to be pitching for the Brewers now; who knew?].
What was good: Soriano's ballerina act in left field still terrifies me, and I still feel it could jeopardize what he does at the plate, but this is the best start he's gotten off to as a Cub. Brilliant.
Aramis Ramirez also appears to want MVP consideration. His laser off the scoreboard in left took out a tile. He also drove in four runs. Not a bad night. Little Mike Fontenot added a three-run moon shot, and his cajun counterpart continued to get on base at an alraming clip. As Len and Bob noted during the telecast, the bullpen issues become a lot less prevalent when you put 11 runs on the board. Bravo gentlemen, bravo.
Speaking of the bullpen, after allowing a home run, David Patton put it into cruise control and breezed through two innings of work. Angel Guzman turned in another quality performance, and Carlos Marmol appears to have put his WBC meltdown behind him. We're going to need these three throughout the season, and tonight was a solid indicator of just how valuable they are.
And now, the bad: Ted Lilly not only had trouble keeping the ball down, he had trouble keeping it in the park. Unfortunately, those two are often related. Maybe it was the early lead, or maybe it was just a typical early season stammer; whatever the case, it does raise the question of the WBC: are players getting enough time to get themselves into MLB shape, and is the WBC a mischeduled hindrance that's going to haunt ball clubs across the board?
And now more bad news: last year's club MVP [at least in this kid's eyes] Geovany Soto was sent back to Chicago to have his shoulder examined. Soto points to an instance in the minor leagues where he felt a similar unexplained discomfort, and that case was resolved without issue in a week. Hopefully we'll see similar results, if not better. Soto was so valuable, not just for his bat, but because of the way he handled the pitching staff. We need that back in the lineup and behind the plate. Additionally, we're only carring one healthy catcher in Koyie Hill. That's a recipe for disaster should something happen to him.
I can't end on that sad note though. Check out this video of Billy Bob Thorton that's circling the web. Absolutely hi-lar-ious.
Soriano continued his torrid start, helping lead the way to an 11-6 win that saw five Cubs finish the game with multiple hits. Kosuke Fukudome turned in an All-Star performance as well with a 4-for-5 showing that included a home run and a double.
The win clinched the series victory for the Cubs. After an off day, they'll continue their season in Milwaukee where Rich Harden faces off against Braden Looper [who miraculously appears to be pitching for the Brewers now; who knew?].
What was good: Soriano's ballerina act in left field still terrifies me, and I still feel it could jeopardize what he does at the plate, but this is the best start he's gotten off to as a Cub. Brilliant.
Aramis Ramirez also appears to want MVP consideration. His laser off the scoreboard in left took out a tile. He also drove in four runs. Not a bad night. Little Mike Fontenot added a three-run moon shot, and his cajun counterpart continued to get on base at an alraming clip. As Len and Bob noted during the telecast, the bullpen issues become a lot less prevalent when you put 11 runs on the board. Bravo gentlemen, bravo.
Speaking of the bullpen, after allowing a home run, David Patton put it into cruise control and breezed through two innings of work. Angel Guzman turned in another quality performance, and Carlos Marmol appears to have put his WBC meltdown behind him. We're going to need these three throughout the season, and tonight was a solid indicator of just how valuable they are.
And now, the bad: Ted Lilly not only had trouble keeping the ball down, he had trouble keeping it in the park. Unfortunately, those two are often related. Maybe it was the early lead, or maybe it was just a typical early season stammer; whatever the case, it does raise the question of the WBC: are players getting enough time to get themselves into MLB shape, and is the WBC a mischeduled hindrance that's going to haunt ball clubs across the board?
And now more bad news: last year's club MVP [at least in this kid's eyes] Geovany Soto was sent back to Chicago to have his shoulder examined. Soto points to an instance in the minor leagues where he felt a similar unexplained discomfort, and that case was resolved without issue in a week. Hopefully we'll see similar results, if not better. Soto was so valuable, not just for his bat, but because of the way he handled the pitching staff. We need that back in the lineup and behind the plate. Additionally, we're only carring one healthy catcher in Koyie Hill. That's a recipe for disaster should something happen to him.
I can't end on that sad note though. Check out this video of Billy Bob Thorton that's circling the web. Absolutely hi-lar-ious.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Too Many Questions
And now, back to our regularly scheduled broadcast:
Almost on cue, the Chicago Cubs revealed one of their major flaws, THE flaw that might prevent them from the remarkable: the bullpen imploded. Now, to be fair, Kevin Gregg was really the one that gave up the final run in the 3-2 10-inning loss to Houston Tuesday, but Gregg's misadventures raise the questions plaguing Cubs fans nationwide:
What can David Patton do outside of A-ball?
What will Aaron Heilman look like in September?
Can Kevin Gregg close in the cold? Can he close for a team in Chicago?
Which Angel Guzman will show up?
Who's going to lock down long relief?
Is Neal Cotts capable of being a lefty specialist?
These are all questions that are going to play out over the season, and I expect several of them to play out in the Cubs favor. Guzman closed the spring strong and looked great last night. We have a few arms in the minors that can pitch in should they be needed for long relief; consider this a trial phase. And regardless of what Gregg does, we still have Marmol as an insurance policy. Lou has said the better man for the job is going to close, and I expect that to be the case if Gregg has a hard time acclimating to the cold and Marmol is electric [remember, Gregg was closing in Florida last year where he didn't have to deal with a Chicago winter or any fans at the ballpark].
Still, bullpen rant aside, Soriano continued to hit; yes, his home run was supplemented with strike outs, but man, that ball traveled. Once again, Alfonso gave me a reason not to chase him into Lake Michigan, and Rick Sutcliffe's Soriano for the MVP pick doesn't look so foolish. Then again, it's still early, so let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Also, Dempster looked solid. I'll take two runs over six innings any day of the week, especially when he's going up against unlikely Cub-killer Wandy Rodriguez [who?] in a hitter's park like Houston. It was also nice to see Derrek Lee get in on the action, as he's going to have to step it up from last year if he doesn't want to see his at bats go to Hoffpauir [check to see how many times I misspell his name this season, as the winner gets a prize]. And Theriot hit as well. Our middle infielders have to get on base, and thus far, they've been solid at the plate.
All things considered, that's not a terrible loss; sure, it's one of those winnable games that could come back to haunt you in the stretch run, and you never want to see a lineup this potent restricted to two runs by a pitcher with a career ERA hovering around 5.00, but there were certainly some positives worth focusing on. Still, it's hard to shake the feeling that there are just too many questions with the bullpen.
Stay tuned; I can't see this question being relegated to the back-burner at any point this season.
Almost on cue, the Chicago Cubs revealed one of their major flaws, THE flaw that might prevent them from the remarkable: the bullpen imploded. Now, to be fair, Kevin Gregg was really the one that gave up the final run in the 3-2 10-inning loss to Houston Tuesday, but Gregg's misadventures raise the questions plaguing Cubs fans nationwide:
What can David Patton do outside of A-ball?
What will Aaron Heilman look like in September?
Can Kevin Gregg close in the cold? Can he close for a team in Chicago?
Which Angel Guzman will show up?
Who's going to lock down long relief?
Is Neal Cotts capable of being a lefty specialist?
These are all questions that are going to play out over the season, and I expect several of them to play out in the Cubs favor. Guzman closed the spring strong and looked great last night. We have a few arms in the minors that can pitch in should they be needed for long relief; consider this a trial phase. And regardless of what Gregg does, we still have Marmol as an insurance policy. Lou has said the better man for the job is going to close, and I expect that to be the case if Gregg has a hard time acclimating to the cold and Marmol is electric [remember, Gregg was closing in Florida last year where he didn't have to deal with a Chicago winter or any fans at the ballpark].
Still, bullpen rant aside, Soriano continued to hit; yes, his home run was supplemented with strike outs, but man, that ball traveled. Once again, Alfonso gave me a reason not to chase him into Lake Michigan, and Rick Sutcliffe's Soriano for the MVP pick doesn't look so foolish. Then again, it's still early, so let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Also, Dempster looked solid. I'll take two runs over six innings any day of the week, especially when he's going up against unlikely Cub-killer Wandy Rodriguez [who?] in a hitter's park like Houston. It was also nice to see Derrek Lee get in on the action, as he's going to have to step it up from last year if he doesn't want to see his at bats go to Hoffpauir [check to see how many times I misspell his name this season, as the winner gets a prize]. And Theriot hit as well. Our middle infielders have to get on base, and thus far, they've been solid at the plate.
All things considered, that's not a terrible loss; sure, it's one of those winnable games that could come back to haunt you in the stretch run, and you never want to see a lineup this potent restricted to two runs by a pitcher with a career ERA hovering around 5.00, but there were certainly some positives worth focusing on. Still, it's hard to shake the feeling that there are just too many questions with the bullpen.
Stay tuned; I can't see this question being relegated to the back-burner at any point this season.
My One Night Stand
Earlier this week, I did something truly despicable for a boy raised in Illinois with Midwest values.
I cheered for Michigan St.
I cheered for the Michigan St. team that beat Illinois twice this season. I cheered for the Michigan St. program that has prevented Illinois from winning Big Ten titles. I cheered for the team that I blame for not knocking out Carolina in the 2005 Final Four, letting them walk into the championship game against an Illinois team with a limited inside presence. I cheered for Mateen Cleave's alma mater.
Yeah, awful, I know.
Now, my justification for that is this: am I really going to support a North Carolina program that robbed me of a national title in 2005? Am I really going to forgive Sean May and Raymond Felton? Can I scrub the image of Rashad McCants shirtless flaunting his Carolina jersey? There are only so many ways you can say "no."
So, I had a one night stand with the Spartans. Just like the real thing, a one night stand in sports is a no questions asked night of unruly deeds and conflicting alliances: you normally go after girls with substance and personality, but tonight you're settling for the blond having a conversation with the pepper shaker at a bar. You do unspeakable things with her, things that you'll never tell anyone or even share in a Real World confessional. Yeah, it's that bad.
But this isn't the first time for me, and I'm sure it's not the first time for you. Remember the 2005 Rose Bowl? Texas vs. USC? Who in their right mind cheers for a team that ESPN dubs one of the greatest before they win that year's title? So, I threw up the horns for the night. USC deserved what it had coming. Take that Reggie Bush and your 42-inch vertical.
So, does this mean I cheated on Illinois? Yes and no. Yes, I cheered for Michigan St. But Illinois left me by giving Western Kentucky too many open looks at the three. Illinois left me, and as a single man sitting at the bar, I chose the Spartan girl over the overly-glamorous, often times mean Carolina girl. I made my choice.
I had my one night stand.
[I never expect anyone from the state of North Carolina to forgive me for this, and/or date me. Then again, maybe she will if she's a Duke fan. But that's a whole different problem.]
I cheered for Michigan St.
I cheered for the Michigan St. team that beat Illinois twice this season. I cheered for the Michigan St. program that has prevented Illinois from winning Big Ten titles. I cheered for the team that I blame for not knocking out Carolina in the 2005 Final Four, letting them walk into the championship game against an Illinois team with a limited inside presence. I cheered for Mateen Cleave's alma mater.
Yeah, awful, I know.
Now, my justification for that is this: am I really going to support a North Carolina program that robbed me of a national title in 2005? Am I really going to forgive Sean May and Raymond Felton? Can I scrub the image of Rashad McCants shirtless flaunting his Carolina jersey? There are only so many ways you can say "no."
So, I had a one night stand with the Spartans. Just like the real thing, a one night stand in sports is a no questions asked night of unruly deeds and conflicting alliances: you normally go after girls with substance and personality, but tonight you're settling for the blond having a conversation with the pepper shaker at a bar. You do unspeakable things with her, things that you'll never tell anyone or even share in a Real World confessional. Yeah, it's that bad.
But this isn't the first time for me, and I'm sure it's not the first time for you. Remember the 2005 Rose Bowl? Texas vs. USC? Who in their right mind cheers for a team that ESPN dubs one of the greatest before they win that year's title? So, I threw up the horns for the night. USC deserved what it had coming. Take that Reggie Bush and your 42-inch vertical.
So, does this mean I cheated on Illinois? Yes and no. Yes, I cheered for Michigan St. But Illinois left me by giving Western Kentucky too many open looks at the three. Illinois left me, and as a single man sitting at the bar, I chose the Spartan girl over the overly-glamorous, often times mean Carolina girl. I made my choice.
I had my one night stand.
[I never expect anyone from the state of North Carolina to forgive me for this, and/or date me. Then again, maybe she will if she's a Duke fan. But that's a whole different problem.]
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Just Like Heaven
As far as summers go, the summer of 1987 stands out as one of my finest. I was relatively fresh out of the womb, sporting a few strands of hair, and still twelve years away from the wonders of puberty.
Life in the stroller was grand.
Greg Mottola's Adventureland, set in that wonderful summer of 1987, continues the line of coming-of-age films focused on sex, drugs, and endless pursuit of summer cash. Revolving around a Pittsburgh theme park, Adventureland employs several college educated wanderlusts set on making enough money to continue school and explore everything from Russian literature to the pursuit of underaged girls.
Adventureland has a touch that Superbad, the movie this will inevitably be compared to, doesn't. The language is certainly there. The sex is certainly there. The drinking and smoking runs rampant. But what Superbad lacked, and what Adventureland succeeds with is a dose of reality. Familes suffer financially. Husbands are cheating on wives. Couches have plastic covers. And while Mottola's writing displays a terrific sense of humor and quote-worthy one-liners, he isn't afraid to tackle more than simply the pursuit of sex and drugs. This isn't American Pie, but it certainly isn't The English Patient either.
Jesse Eisenberg plays Michael Cera better than Michael Cera plays Michael Cera. Kristen Stewart sheds the gloom and cardboard appearance she sported in Twilight, playing that girl who you sat next to in high school speech and talked about bands like Radiohead and Pearl Jam. Except in this case, we're treated to Crowded House and The Cure. Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig are great as the park's bosses, and Ryan Reynolds pulls off an unfamiliar role fairly well. The supporting cast, especially Martin Starr and Matt Bush, bring out the best in Jesse Eisenberg's Brennan. Margarita Levieva rounds out the rest of the park's regulars as the sex pot that everyone met during one of those summers, playing the role of the seductress to perfection.
Adventureland is something worth seeing, if only for the reminder of these college summers. These summers, which were blessed with terrible, minimum wage jobs and horrible weekend hours, are unreplaceable. Whether it was the co-workers you slept with in the stcokroom or the kids that pushed you around the store in a cart during your shift, Adventureland is a wonderful reminder of just how great something as bland as working retail could be.
Life in the stroller was grand.
Greg Mottola's Adventureland, set in that wonderful summer of 1987, continues the line of coming-of-age films focused on sex, drugs, and endless pursuit of summer cash. Revolving around a Pittsburgh theme park, Adventureland employs several college educated wanderlusts set on making enough money to continue school and explore everything from Russian literature to the pursuit of underaged girls.
Adventureland has a touch that Superbad, the movie this will inevitably be compared to, doesn't. The language is certainly there. The sex is certainly there. The drinking and smoking runs rampant. But what Superbad lacked, and what Adventureland succeeds with is a dose of reality. Familes suffer financially. Husbands are cheating on wives. Couches have plastic covers. And while Mottola's writing displays a terrific sense of humor and quote-worthy one-liners, he isn't afraid to tackle more than simply the pursuit of sex and drugs. This isn't American Pie, but it certainly isn't The English Patient either.
Jesse Eisenberg plays Michael Cera better than Michael Cera plays Michael Cera. Kristen Stewart sheds the gloom and cardboard appearance she sported in Twilight, playing that girl who you sat next to in high school speech and talked about bands like Radiohead and Pearl Jam. Except in this case, we're treated to Crowded House and The Cure. Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig are great as the park's bosses, and Ryan Reynolds pulls off an unfamiliar role fairly well. The supporting cast, especially Martin Starr and Matt Bush, bring out the best in Jesse Eisenberg's Brennan. Margarita Levieva rounds out the rest of the park's regulars as the sex pot that everyone met during one of those summers, playing the role of the seductress to perfection.
Adventureland is something worth seeing, if only for the reminder of these college summers. These summers, which were blessed with terrible, minimum wage jobs and horrible weekend hours, are unreplaceable. Whether it was the co-workers you slept with in the stcokroom or the kids that pushed you around the store in a cart during your shift, Adventureland is a wonderful reminder of just how great something as bland as working retail could be.
Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I'm Yours
At some point during the past 48 hours, most sports fans started penning love letters to Michael Jordan. Some thanked him for the titles, for bringing an unparalleled glory to the city of Chicago. Some took the John Starks or Jerry Sloan approach and admitted to simultaneously feeling pain and awe. And some will admit to just how cool it was to lace up the shoes, drink the Gatorade, and step out on a playground that always seemed to resemble the United Center or old Chicago Stadium.
Well, at least the hoop on my driveway did.
Nearly every writer who's tackled Jordan's career admits that there aren't enough adjectives in the English language to describe him, nor are there enough verbs to describe how he imposed his will on other teams, on dozens of All-Star players and coaches. So sitting here and trying to find a new way to tackle his greatness and not sound like an overproduced drone is pointless.
To quote the Barenaked Ladies, "It's all been done."
Still, there's something worth mentioning. In the eyes of my generation, the kids who grew up watching Jordan in the 90's and not the 80's, he was a legend. To us, Michael Jordan wasn't a man. After he won a title at North Carolina as a freshman, he was seemingly shifting the ball between his hands in mid-air against the Lakers in the 1991 Finals. There weren't other college years. There was no foot injury, no struggle against the Pistons, no battle with a gambling addiction. To us, those struggles, those altercations don't exist. We awoke to a dominant Jordan, and that is the one we'll remember.
Now, I'm well aware that Jordan struggled throughout his career, but my generation is going to be the first of many that don't view him as a man breaking through physical barriers, redefining will power. We'll view his as something greater, as close to a God as God would allow. With each passing year, the legend will continue to grow. The aura surrounding the "Flu Game," "The Shot," "The Shrug," and "The Finale" will only grow. No one will remember his years with the Wizards, maybe not even Michael himself. They will cease to be grounded in reality, and in an age where athletes have trouble staying on the court because of what they do off of it, Jordan will shine as a sterling example of perfection.
He conducted himself with swagger. Was he arrogant? You bet he was. But it was excusable. Hell, if you're going to dunk over Mt. Mutumbo, you deserve to wag your finger at him. And Jordan did just that. He wagged it at the Pistons, at the Knicks, and at a never ending line of doubters. But he deserved to. Michael Jordan introduced me to swagger.
I'll end with this, one of the oldest lines in the Jordan lexicon: There will never be another Michael Jordan. There will be a Vince Carter. There will be a Kobe Bryant. And there will be a LeBron James. There will be great individuals, accomplishing feats in their own right, feats that should be attributed to them, not filed as comparisons to Jordan. However, they will never be for basketball, for sports, and for a culture what Michael Jordan was. He transcended basketball, transcended the U.S. and introduced the galaxy [you have to acknowledge Space Jam] to a physical world seemingly without limitations. The free throw line will never be seen in the same light after his take off.
Jordan's career affirms his transcendence; the Gatorade commercials are just as prevalent as the five MVP awards, the shoes just as important to YMCA basketball as the 10 scoring titles are to statisticians. Simply put, Michael Jordan was the most complete athlete in an era where an athlete isn't just determined by his stature on the field or the court, but by who he is off of it.
I never saw Chamberlain, Russel, Bird or Magic in their prime, but I saw Jordan. Without question, he's still the best I've ever seen. So, Hall of Fame induction in tow, consider this my love letter.
Well, at least the hoop on my driveway did.
Nearly every writer who's tackled Jordan's career admits that there aren't enough adjectives in the English language to describe him, nor are there enough verbs to describe how he imposed his will on other teams, on dozens of All-Star players and coaches. So sitting here and trying to find a new way to tackle his greatness and not sound like an overproduced drone is pointless.
To quote the Barenaked Ladies, "It's all been done."
Still, there's something worth mentioning. In the eyes of my generation, the kids who grew up watching Jordan in the 90's and not the 80's, he was a legend. To us, Michael Jordan wasn't a man. After he won a title at North Carolina as a freshman, he was seemingly shifting the ball between his hands in mid-air against the Lakers in the 1991 Finals. There weren't other college years. There was no foot injury, no struggle against the Pistons, no battle with a gambling addiction. To us, those struggles, those altercations don't exist. We awoke to a dominant Jordan, and that is the one we'll remember.
Now, I'm well aware that Jordan struggled throughout his career, but my generation is going to be the first of many that don't view him as a man breaking through physical barriers, redefining will power. We'll view his as something greater, as close to a God as God would allow. With each passing year, the legend will continue to grow. The aura surrounding the "Flu Game," "The Shot," "The Shrug," and "The Finale" will only grow. No one will remember his years with the Wizards, maybe not even Michael himself. They will cease to be grounded in reality, and in an age where athletes have trouble staying on the court because of what they do off of it, Jordan will shine as a sterling example of perfection.
He conducted himself with swagger. Was he arrogant? You bet he was. But it was excusable. Hell, if you're going to dunk over Mt. Mutumbo, you deserve to wag your finger at him. And Jordan did just that. He wagged it at the Pistons, at the Knicks, and at a never ending line of doubters. But he deserved to. Michael Jordan introduced me to swagger.
I'll end with this, one of the oldest lines in the Jordan lexicon: There will never be another Michael Jordan. There will be a Vince Carter. There will be a Kobe Bryant. And there will be a LeBron James. There will be great individuals, accomplishing feats in their own right, feats that should be attributed to them, not filed as comparisons to Jordan. However, they will never be for basketball, for sports, and for a culture what Michael Jordan was. He transcended basketball, transcended the U.S. and introduced the galaxy [you have to acknowledge Space Jam] to a physical world seemingly without limitations. The free throw line will never be seen in the same light after his take off.
Jordan's career affirms his transcendence; the Gatorade commercials are just as prevalent as the five MVP awards, the shoes just as important to YMCA basketball as the 10 scoring titles are to statisticians. Simply put, Michael Jordan was the most complete athlete in an era where an athlete isn't just determined by his stature on the field or the court, but by who he is off of it.
I never saw Chamberlain, Russel, Bird or Magic in their prime, but I saw Jordan. Without question, he's still the best I've ever seen. So, Hall of Fame induction in tow, consider this my love letter.
Monday, April 6, 2009
And Away We Go...
Carlos Zambrano's last outing against the Houston Astros resulted in an iTunes purchase from Baseball's Best Games of 2008. For the low price of $1.99, you can watch Papa Z do something no Cub had done since the Nixon administration, which is staggeringly awful when you consider that Bud Smith threw a no-hitter for the Cardinals in 2001.
Yeah, Bud Smith.
Welcome to the world of a lifelong Cubs fan.
This time around, not too much was different. Papa Z wasn't flawless, but he was solid over six innings, notching his first Opening Day win and giving the folks in Chicago something to cheer about after his harshly-criticized Wrigley Field comments. A 4-2 victory over a division rival will do that, and so will six innings of one-run ball.
In other news, little Mike Fontenot played a lot bigger than 5'8" and Alfonso Soriano gave me one less reason to chase him into Lake Michigan with a lead off home run. Unfortunately, his hop survived the offseason.
But Milton Bradley high-fiving someone in the stands during the game? That ranks right up there with Papa Z's no-no, which also happens to be the best $1.99 I've ever spent. No,not really. But it was still great to see Bradley interacting with Cubs fans since we're going to be spending a lot of time together this summer. I just don't want to hear the letters "D.L." anytime before June. Please.
Seriously though, the bullpen still gives me the creeps.
But a win is a win, and there's no better way to close an Opening Day. Well, maybe with the Bears locking down a No. 1 receiver and Rock of Love getting another season, but a boy can only wish for so much. Now, for the three or four readers out there checking in to see if I'm already violating any of Google's standards or finding one more way to inexplicably incorporate Lisa Lampanelli in a post, I have one thing to say:
One down, only 161 to go. Stay tuned, potential heartbreak and/or ecstasy is just around the corner.
Yeah, Bud Smith.
Welcome to the world of a lifelong Cubs fan.
This time around, not too much was different. Papa Z wasn't flawless, but he was solid over six innings, notching his first Opening Day win and giving the folks in Chicago something to cheer about after his harshly-criticized Wrigley Field comments. A 4-2 victory over a division rival will do that, and so will six innings of one-run ball.
In other news, little Mike Fontenot played a lot bigger than 5'8" and Alfonso Soriano gave me one less reason to chase him into Lake Michigan with a lead off home run. Unfortunately, his hop survived the offseason.
But Milton Bradley high-fiving someone in the stands during the game? That ranks right up there with Papa Z's no-no, which also happens to be the best $1.99 I've ever spent. No,not really. But it was still great to see Bradley interacting with Cubs fans since we're going to be spending a lot of time together this summer. I just don't want to hear the letters "D.L." anytime before June. Please.
Seriously though, the bullpen still gives me the creeps.
But a win is a win, and there's no better way to close an Opening Day. Well, maybe with the Bears locking down a No. 1 receiver and Rock of Love getting another season, but a boy can only wish for so much. Now, for the three or four readers out there checking in to see if I'm already violating any of Google's standards or finding one more way to inexplicably incorporate Lisa Lampanelli in a post, I have one thing to say:
One down, only 161 to go. Stay tuned, potential heartbreak and/or ecstasy is just around the corner.
And In The Beginning...
Former NL MVP Dale Murphy once said that “Playing baseball is not real life. It's a fantasy world. It's a dream come true.”
Clearly, Dale Murphy never played for the Cubs.
It’s trendy nowadays to either belittle the Cubs, as they so seemingly deserve, or crown them champions of one pennant or another before they’ve even sniffed the grass at Minute Maid Park. Thirteen years ago I started an experiment called “What Life Is Like As A Cubs Fan,” and it’s safe to say that the results have been mixed.
Drewtopia seems to be one of them.
Instead of withholding all of the anger, resentment, unadulterated joy and occasional sighs of relief, I’m going to be sharing it here for those with stomachs big enough to handle it. Consider this a place you can go if you want to watch me take literary target practice against Alfonso Soriano’s hop or Prince Fielder’s belt size.
Hell, Dale Murphy, you’re even invited as well.
I’ll stay true to myself and my convictions as a disgruntled, often-naïve Cubs fan until someone decides to offer me enough money to stop. So, here are some of my unrivaled predictions and rants, minutes before the Cubs take the field for the 2009 season. Enjoy:
I promise not to be a jaded Cubs fan this year. I said this last year, and by the end of June I joined every disillusioned media outlet by claiming that they had a shot. That this was the year. That the Lollipop Guild from the Wizard of Oz wasn’t terrifying. Nope. Not anymore. No more lies. I’ll admit the Central is for the taking, but the last thing I need is to spend another October night in a bar drinking cheap beer with lonely Royals fans. I’m going to give realism a shot.
Len Kasper and Bob Brenly will be deserving of their own reality TV show by the end of the season. Seriously. This is one of the best tandems in baseball. If FOX was willing to give Temptation Island a shot and NBC is still fondling the animal nesting on Donald Trump’s head, then these two can at least score a deal on The CW or Bravo.
Hope does NOT spring eternal. I don’t care who you are or what prescription drug you’re siphoning off from your friends at the local pharmacy, the Seattle Mariners are not going to win it all. Neither are the Brewers. Or the Pirates. Or anyone else from the NL Central, including the Cubs. At some point, to minimize the heartbreak and prevent yourself from aimlessly wandering around Chicago after Game 3 and trying to make it to Canada by walking through Lake Michigan, you have to come to terms with reality. The Cubs have a legit team this year, but I’m willing to say on Day One that this team isn’t going to do it. It doesn’t matter that our record is 0-0 and we have just as good a chance as anyone. Hope is a commodity that teams with airtight bullpens enjoy.
[Side Note: By eliminating the Cubs from contention on Day One, I’m hoping that A) The Baseball Gods accept the fact that I’m playing the role of the realist this season and reward me with a few unexpected surprises, maybe even a postseason win, or B) The bullpen reads this, uses it as bulletin board material and joins the Pantheon of Historic Bullpens, or C) I don’t pin a few months worth of hope on a team that hasn’t been able to consummate its marriage to its fans in over 100 years. It’s my three-pronged minimize the suffering assault]
I will never, under any circumstances, name or blame 2003’s most misunderstood fan. Stick with Alex Gonzalez botching the double play ball or Dusty not keeping tabs on Prior. Blaming the other guy is almost as bad as admitting to playing Magic: The Gathering. Seriously.
I will only confess my love for the Cubs 10 times this season. The Cubs do for your love life what Lisa Lampanelli would do for internet porn: unnecessary disaster. I’ve dated White Sox fans. I’ve dated Cubs fans. It doesn’t make a difference. No girl ever wants to be slotted behind a baseball team on your Things I Love lineup card. Admitting that is almost as helpful as the natural male enhancement tools being advertised between the hours of 2 and 5 am on Saturday mornings. This one is really for the best.
I’ll take it easy on Derrek Lee. Professional sports is a “what have you done for me lately” world, and lately Derrek Lee hasn’t done much offensively. Defensively, he’s about as good as Brett Michaels is at finding ways to keep his career alive [Insert shameless Rock of Love Season Finale plug here]. This is where you find out who the true Cubs fans are and who is a fan of the Cubs themselves. What I mean by that is this: we all remember what Lee did for this team in 2005. That was a morbid year, and Lee legitimately contended for the Triple Crown at one point in the season. He’s an advocate for his family, even going as far as starring on an episode of ER when they agreed to highlight a disease that his daughter was suffering from. He tried to beat the Padres by himself. Literally. Ask Chris Young. The list goes on-and-on. I feel terrible pushing for Micah Hoffpauir [try spelling that without Wikipedia] at first base, but the truth is he’s hitting and should probably see A LOT of at bats this season. But Derrek Lee is a gamer, and no matter what Hoffpauir does or Lee doesn’t, I can’t turn on him. I’m getting soft in my old age. Plus, there’s always the hope he’ll pull a Kyle Farnsworth on someone. Just maybe.
I WILL turn on Alfonso Soriano. And so will the rest of Chicago if he drops a single fly ball because of that godforsaken hop that screams BRANT BROWN every time I see him do it. For those of you who don’t remember who Brown was, just ask Ron Santo. He’ll relive that one for you. Back to the matter at hand: the kid has all of the talent in the world, but his head is a mess. His fundamentals are about as sound as Nicholas Cage’s film career; you know they’re out there, but they aren’t doing the public any good. Enough. Soriano is making more money than God and A-Rod combined. No? Not really. But he’s making too much to continue to be mediocre. I can live with the Moonwalk to first base if it means three-homer games on occasion; I can’t live with the hop and poor plate approaches, especially if/when he finds himself in the lead off spot.
I will continue to unequivocally hate Notre Dame without exception and hold Jeff Samardzija to an unbelievably high, unfair standard. We all have our targets. Some choose the Yankees. Some choose Duke. Some choose dairy products. I chose Notre Dame. Deal with it.
If in fact they do win it all, and they’re not playing Cleveland in the World Series, I hope they bring Kerry Wood back in some capacity. He wasn’t Santo. He wasn’t Banks. But to my generation, a generation plagued with steroids rumors and Clue-like scenarios, he was a landmark. He was the Cubs. I’ll even pay for his World Series tickets if it means he gets to be there when they do it. After all, he should be the one on the mound closing it out at Wrigley Field. You can hold me to that.
And there you have it. Let’s see what 2009 has in store for legions of unhealthy, disillusioned, but always entertaining Cubs fans.
Welcome to Drewtopia.
Clearly, Dale Murphy never played for the Cubs.
It’s trendy nowadays to either belittle the Cubs, as they so seemingly deserve, or crown them champions of one pennant or another before they’ve even sniffed the grass at Minute Maid Park. Thirteen years ago I started an experiment called “What Life Is Like As A Cubs Fan,” and it’s safe to say that the results have been mixed.
Drewtopia seems to be one of them.
Instead of withholding all of the anger, resentment, unadulterated joy and occasional sighs of relief, I’m going to be sharing it here for those with stomachs big enough to handle it. Consider this a place you can go if you want to watch me take literary target practice against Alfonso Soriano’s hop or Prince Fielder’s belt size.
Hell, Dale Murphy, you’re even invited as well.
I’ll stay true to myself and my convictions as a disgruntled, often-naïve Cubs fan until someone decides to offer me enough money to stop. So, here are some of my unrivaled predictions and rants, minutes before the Cubs take the field for the 2009 season. Enjoy:
I promise not to be a jaded Cubs fan this year. I said this last year, and by the end of June I joined every disillusioned media outlet by claiming that they had a shot. That this was the year. That the Lollipop Guild from the Wizard of Oz wasn’t terrifying. Nope. Not anymore. No more lies. I’ll admit the Central is for the taking, but the last thing I need is to spend another October night in a bar drinking cheap beer with lonely Royals fans. I’m going to give realism a shot.
Len Kasper and Bob Brenly will be deserving of their own reality TV show by the end of the season. Seriously. This is one of the best tandems in baseball. If FOX was willing to give Temptation Island a shot and NBC is still fondling the animal nesting on Donald Trump’s head, then these two can at least score a deal on The CW or Bravo.
Hope does NOT spring eternal. I don’t care who you are or what prescription drug you’re siphoning off from your friends at the local pharmacy, the Seattle Mariners are not going to win it all. Neither are the Brewers. Or the Pirates. Or anyone else from the NL Central, including the Cubs. At some point, to minimize the heartbreak and prevent yourself from aimlessly wandering around Chicago after Game 3 and trying to make it to Canada by walking through Lake Michigan, you have to come to terms with reality. The Cubs have a legit team this year, but I’m willing to say on Day One that this team isn’t going to do it. It doesn’t matter that our record is 0-0 and we have just as good a chance as anyone. Hope is a commodity that teams with airtight bullpens enjoy.
[Side Note: By eliminating the Cubs from contention on Day One, I’m hoping that A) The Baseball Gods accept the fact that I’m playing the role of the realist this season and reward me with a few unexpected surprises, maybe even a postseason win, or B) The bullpen reads this, uses it as bulletin board material and joins the Pantheon of Historic Bullpens, or C) I don’t pin a few months worth of hope on a team that hasn’t been able to consummate its marriage to its fans in over 100 years. It’s my three-pronged minimize the suffering assault]
I will never, under any circumstances, name or blame 2003’s most misunderstood fan. Stick with Alex Gonzalez botching the double play ball or Dusty not keeping tabs on Prior. Blaming the other guy is almost as bad as admitting to playing Magic: The Gathering. Seriously.
I will only confess my love for the Cubs 10 times this season. The Cubs do for your love life what Lisa Lampanelli would do for internet porn: unnecessary disaster. I’ve dated White Sox fans. I’ve dated Cubs fans. It doesn’t make a difference. No girl ever wants to be slotted behind a baseball team on your Things I Love lineup card. Admitting that is almost as helpful as the natural male enhancement tools being advertised between the hours of 2 and 5 am on Saturday mornings. This one is really for the best.
I’ll take it easy on Derrek Lee. Professional sports is a “what have you done for me lately” world, and lately Derrek Lee hasn’t done much offensively. Defensively, he’s about as good as Brett Michaels is at finding ways to keep his career alive [Insert shameless Rock of Love Season Finale plug here]. This is where you find out who the true Cubs fans are and who is a fan of the Cubs themselves. What I mean by that is this: we all remember what Lee did for this team in 2005. That was a morbid year, and Lee legitimately contended for the Triple Crown at one point in the season. He’s an advocate for his family, even going as far as starring on an episode of ER when they agreed to highlight a disease that his daughter was suffering from. He tried to beat the Padres by himself. Literally. Ask Chris Young. The list goes on-and-on. I feel terrible pushing for Micah Hoffpauir [try spelling that without Wikipedia] at first base, but the truth is he’s hitting and should probably see A LOT of at bats this season. But Derrek Lee is a gamer, and no matter what Hoffpauir does or Lee doesn’t, I can’t turn on him. I’m getting soft in my old age. Plus, there’s always the hope he’ll pull a Kyle Farnsworth on someone. Just maybe.
I WILL turn on Alfonso Soriano. And so will the rest of Chicago if he drops a single fly ball because of that godforsaken hop that screams BRANT BROWN every time I see him do it. For those of you who don’t remember who Brown was, just ask Ron Santo. He’ll relive that one for you. Back to the matter at hand: the kid has all of the talent in the world, but his head is a mess. His fundamentals are about as sound as Nicholas Cage’s film career; you know they’re out there, but they aren’t doing the public any good. Enough. Soriano is making more money than God and A-Rod combined. No? Not really. But he’s making too much to continue to be mediocre. I can live with the Moonwalk to first base if it means three-homer games on occasion; I can’t live with the hop and poor plate approaches, especially if/when he finds himself in the lead off spot.
I will continue to unequivocally hate Notre Dame without exception and hold Jeff Samardzija to an unbelievably high, unfair standard. We all have our targets. Some choose the Yankees. Some choose Duke. Some choose dairy products. I chose Notre Dame. Deal with it.
If in fact they do win it all, and they’re not playing Cleveland in the World Series, I hope they bring Kerry Wood back in some capacity. He wasn’t Santo. He wasn’t Banks. But to my generation, a generation plagued with steroids rumors and Clue-like scenarios, he was a landmark. He was the Cubs. I’ll even pay for his World Series tickets if it means he gets to be there when they do it. After all, he should be the one on the mound closing it out at Wrigley Field. You can hold me to that.
And there you have it. Let’s see what 2009 has in store for legions of unhealthy, disillusioned, but always entertaining Cubs fans.
Welcome to Drewtopia.
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